The last time I had a metal-geek-out was when Lemmy Kilmister came on. Now, Lemmy was grumpy, and difficult, and way out of his element, but he was still Lemmy.
Slash…is a different animal entirely.
Slash has the renown, the name, the reputation, and is much bigger than anybody that’s been on this show before. He’s Slash. He’s the guitarist for Guns ‘N Roses. He’s one of the greatest guitarists of all time. And he’s on NMTB…for some reason.
The rest of the panel looks decent enough, and features the return of VJ Josie D’Arby. Paul Marazzi sang with A1. Tony Blackburn was a Pirate Radio DJ, and won I’m a Celebrity a year after being on NMTB.
AAAAND Slash is smoking a cigarette. Top of the show. All class, this one.
Sean: “Super Furry Animals were the first thing Marty Peller saw when he went into rehab.”
Mark: “Hallucinated, d’ya mean?”
Sean: “No, the band was there. He really liked them.”
Sean on Paul: “I just feel like I’m babysitting for Eminem’s little brother…”
Tony: “My connection is that they’re both related to Mrs. Mill.”
Mark: “Like they’re gonna remember Mrs. Mill…they barely remember YOU!”
Mark, summing up this episode succinctly: “Blackburn and Slash. What a team!”
Phill: “That’s a cop show I’d pay to see. Blackburn and Slash. BOOK EM, BLACKBURN!”
Tony: “I have a connection with Phill as well, because I’m also at the cutting edge of comedy.”
Phill: “Yeah, and I’m a shit DJ.”
Phill and Tony do hug it out after this joke.
Mark, after Tony’s umpteenth connection: “We all have a connection, too. We’re all sitting in the same place WAITING FOR AN ANSWER!”
Sean, to Paul before Intros: “PLEASE STAND UP…PLEASE STAND UP…”
Things Mark sings to throw off Sean’s intros: I Can See Clearly Now, which he awards Josie a point for guessing out of confusion, and Theme from Shaft.
Mark, right before Slash has to do intros: “Buckle up, we’re in for a bumpy ride.”
Phill: “This might take a while. Each one has a thirty minute guitar solo.”
Tony: “I’ll have you know I’ve released 18 singles.”
Mark: “Oh, really? Back into the wild?”
Slash says his family’s gonna be watching this. “My cousin’s gonna be going, like “what the hell’s he doing up there?”
Mark: “He won’t be alone.”
So let me get this straight…there’s an ID Parade where they have to guess a black guy…and Athelston Williams is NOT one of the 5 choices? They did, however, get the guy with the long face, aka Swollen River.
Sean, on the ID Parade: “It’s great to see Musical Youth back together.”
Phill: “I think #4…is Shaggy from Scooby Doo. “YIKES! YOU ARE A REAL GHOST!!”
(Ironically it ends up being number 4.)
Mark: “Phill’s team, you need ten to win.”
Phill: “THIS LOOKS LIKE A CASE FOR BLACKBURN AND SLASH!!”
Mark refuses to give Tony a point for being too “snooty.”
Tony: “That’s not fair.”
Slash: “It’s fair. He’s a prick, it’s alright.”
Mark: “I think Slash is mad because he didn’t get a point…on a song called Teenager in Love by Marty Wilde….YOU GIT.”
Mark: “Take me down to the paradise city.”
Slash: “Where the girls got…I mean…when the girls…”
Mark, eventually: “Whatever you’d said, I would have accepted it. I can’t make out any of it…”
Mark: “For those about to rock.”
Slash: “We will rock you.”
Mark: “No, we salute you.”
Slash: “We salute you. Goddammit…”
Mark: “Ya PRICK…GETTIN’ IT WRONG!”
Overall: Had a slow middle, but still a very funny episode, with a good panel, even if it was slightly a step down from Ep. 2. Slash and Tony were the perfect combination of crazy, and Slash really came alive as the night went on. Paul was only good for a few Eminem jokes. Josie was funny because Sean or Mark could screw with her.
Best Regular: Mark
Best Guest: Slash
Best Runner: Tony’s finger.