Nevermind Watchdown: S11E1, or THE BAILEY ERA BEGINS!!

Well, since i’m on such a hot streak, I might as well move onto Series 11, and leave the Sean Hughes years behind, sadly. The good news is that means BILL BAILEY is now a REGULAR! That’s a phrase I haven’t used since Space Cadets. Seriously, I’m pumped, excited, and love what he could do to this show.

As for the panelists, we get Claire Grogan again, but also Kerry Katona’s Atomic Kitten bandmate Jenny Frost, Radio DJ Mark Goodier, and TV presenter Ben Shepherd.

The first part of the show is Mark, in full Dad’s Army regalia, auditioning people for Sean’s spot. A bunch of old guys do off-color material, until Bill just says three words and Mark lets him in.

Phill, on Charlotte Church and Gary Barlow: “Do both get uncontrollably weepy at the mention of Robbie Williams?”
Mark: “…when you say WEEPY…”

Phill, on the Church video: “I think she’s in the Empire State Building, because outside the window, you can see the pink, veiny testicle of King Kong!”
Mark: “THAT MONKEY’S GOT SOME BIG BALLS!”

Ben: “D’you think a jelly-baby took a gigantic dump on his chest?”
Mark: “What, ‘oh, they’re so whimsical, they shit in big numbers!”

Mark mentions that any Jimmy Savile impression makes him really happy, even if it’s shit. Jenny gives a shitty one. Bill does a Yoda impression instead, going “Pleasure do I feel!!”

Mark, after a fairly obscure Bill joke: “Bill’s brought a lot of Haitian references to the show this series…”
Bill: “Haiti, of course, was the secret dwarf that was not spoken about. There was grumpy, sneezy and HATEY, THE EMBODIMENT OF PURE EVIL!”

Mark, on the shot of Jimmy Savile in a beret: “Could you imagine, if Che Guevara looked like that there’d be no posters of him anywhere.”

Mark: “Jimmy Savile famously once spent five days locked in a room with his dead mother. Of course, since then the producers have modified the Big Brother format…”

Mark: “In 1992, Sony signed Jamiroquai to an 8-album deal, although they later sacked the lawyer for not specifying that they wanted 8 SEPARATE ALBUMS!”

Phill, upon seeing Jenny and bill standing to do Intros: “I must rent a copy of Beauty and the Beast when I get home…”
Bill, in response, does his sort of grotesque look, like his Graham Osmond look, around Jenny.

Next Lines: “One pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small.”
Phill: “Ooh, I’ll have one of those…”

Overall: Not a ton going on here tonight, but enough to establish Bill as a worthy successor to Sean, and enough from Claire and Jenny to keep things interesting.

Best Regular: Mark
Best Guest: Claire
Best Runner: “I SAY ‘enjoyed’…”

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One thought on “Nevermind Watchdown: S11E1, or THE BAILEY ERA BEGINS!!

  1. One of the “auditionees” shown was comedian and former game show host Jim Bowen (he hosted the darts-based game show “Bullseye” for 14 years on ITV). He’s the one who Mark tells “This isn’t the sort of show where we abuse people who aren’t here and can’t answer back!”

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