Nevermind Watchdown: S13E7, or Needs More Monkey

Three people I’ve heard of on this show- Matt ‘Aqualung’ Hales, Adam ‘One-Legged’ Hills, and Jayne Middlemiss. Additionally, Guy Garvey, singer for indie-rock band Elbow, is also on the panel.

Guy says he knew a runner for the BBC who worked with J. Lo and Elton John on the same day, both being notoriously hard to deal with.
Guy: “Apparently Elton just wanted a bit of salt for his chicken.”
Jayne: “And suckin’ off. Sorry.”
Mark: “Only kidding. Yeah, that’ll save any legal problems.”

Mark says that Shania Twain has to do with the J.lo-Avril connection.
Guy: “Shania Twain could operate them both from her castle.”
Mark: “I never thought they’d guess this one.”

Jayne: “Did they both get discovered by Shania Twain?”
Mark: “YES!”
Bill: “Under a rock.”
Mark: *YES!!!*”

Phill’s wearing a shirt with the cover of Rush’s Signals album on it. Very, very cool.

Adam: “I wonder if Morrissey’s been on Sesame Street, or the Muppets, cause a lot of current musicians are on.”
Mark: “Yes, but he’s not the sort, “HEY, YOU’RE ADORABLE, ME…”

Phill does a Luther Vandross voice for a dub-over, but Mark notes: “Hang on, where’s he from, by the way? He’s from the same as every other pop star you’ve ever done a voiceover for! ‘ELLO, I’M BARRY WHITE! ‘AND I’M BING CROSBY! We live next door to each other in Phill’s Imaginary Bad Impression World!”

Mark: “I’d love to see you on Stars in Their Eyes. “AND TONIGHT MATTHEW, I’LL BE ANYONE YOU WANT!!”

Adam trying to figure out Phill’s 1st intro, with Matt doing a weird primate-esque noise: “I dunno, was there a band in the 80’s that had some sort of chimp in it?”
Mark: “I dunno, [to Bill] were you in a band in the 80’s?”
Bill: “I was.”
Mark: “Yes, there was.”

For Phill’s 2nd intro, Matt starts doing the chimp noises, only even more escalated. Mark goes to Bill “HE’S STOLEN YOUR ACT!”
Mark: “All of Phill’s impressions are basically Bernard Manning, and all of [Matt’s] instruments are monkeys.”

Matt: “The thing is, multi-instrumentalists are usually very smug, so you have to look for that smug expression as if-”
Mark: “Hey, aren’t you a multi-instrumentalist?”
Matt, smugly: “Yes, I am.”

Adam: “I’d like to think #5 was in Duran Duran.”
Mark: “Yeah, but we’re doing the Human League…”

Jayne: “#1, did we go to school together?”
Mark: “You didn’t go to school, Jayne. You’re foolin’ no one.”
Jayne: “DAMN!”

This week, instead of Next Lines, Mark gives Opening Lines, and the panel has to give the title of the song.

Mark: “I made it through the wilderness.”
Jayne: “Ah, Madonna.”
Mark: “It is Madonna, but it could be Bill’s autobiography.”

Overall: A bit more consistent than the last few, thanks to a tighter panel. Not the most uproarious, but Matt’s chimp noises, Jayne’s fillet a fox, and some nice lines from Guy and Adam made it pretty worthwhile.

Best Regular: Phill
Best Guest: Jayne
Best Runner: Monkey noises.


One thought on “Nevermind Watchdown: S13E7, or Needs More Monkey

  1. The Opening Lines round was last played in the 1999 Christmas Special. I wish they’d played it more often, maybe once or twice a series.

    The sports panel show around this time also made by Talkback, “They Think It’s All Over”, had a quickfire end round called the Name Game where one of the regulars had to give clues to the names of famous sports people, and they occasionally changed it up by making them give clues to sports teams, do impressions or mimes, or draw the clues.

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