Nevermind Watchdown: S13E7, or Needs More Monkey

Three people I’ve heard of on this show- Matt ‘Aqualung’ Hales, Adam ‘One-Legged’ Hills, and Jayne Middlemiss. Additionally, Guy Garvey, singer for indie-rock band Elbow, is also on the panel.

Guy says he knew a runner for the BBC who worked with J. Lo and Elton John on the same day, both being notoriously hard to deal with.
Guy: “Apparently Elton just wanted a bit of salt for his chicken.”
Jayne: “And suckin’ off. Sorry.”
Mark: “Only kidding. Yeah, that’ll save any legal problems.”

Mark says that Shania Twain has to do with the J.lo-Avril connection.
Guy: “Shania Twain could operate them both from her castle.”
Bill: “YES! WITH HER BIG LEVERS…THAT SHE USES.”
Mark: “I never thought they’d guess this one.”
Guy: “DIVORCE! MARRY! DIVORCE! SHIT RECORD!”

Jayne: “Did they both get discovered by Shania Twain?”
Mark: “YES!”
Bill: “Under a rock.”
Mark: *YES!!!*”

Phill’s wearing a shirt with the cover of Rush’s Signals album on it. Very, very cool.

Adam: “I wonder if Morrissey’s been on Sesame Street, or the Muppets, cause a lot of current musicians are on.”
Mark: “Yes, but he’s not the sort, “HEY, YOU’RE ADORABLE, ME…”
Phill: “ONE!! ONE MISERABLE SONG! AH-AH-AHHHH!!!”

Phill does a Luther Vandross voice for a dub-over, but Mark notes: “Hang on, where’s he from, by the way? He’s from the same as every other pop star you’ve ever done a voiceover for! ‘ELLO, I’M BARRY WHITE! ‘AND I’M BING CROSBY! We live next door to each other in Phill’s Imaginary Bad Impression World!”

Mark: “I’d love to see you on Stars in Their Eyes. “AND TONIGHT MATTHEW, I’LL BE ANYONE YOU WANT!!”

Adam trying to figure out Phill’s 1st intro, with Matt doing a weird primate-esque noise: “I dunno, was there a band in the 80’s that had some sort of chimp in it?”
Mark: “I dunno, [to Bill] were you in a band in the 80’s?”
Bill: “I was.”
Mark: “Yes, there was.”

For Phill’s 2nd intro, Matt starts doing the chimp noises, only even more escalated. Mark goes to Bill “HE’S STOLEN YOUR ACT!”
Eventually Phill has to go “TAKE YOUR STINKING HANDS OFF ME…YOU DAMN DIRTY APE!”
Mark: “All of Phill’s impressions are basically Bernard Manning, and all of [Matt’s] instruments are monkeys.”

Matt: “The thing is, multi-instrumentalists are usually very smug, so you have to look for that smug expression as if-”
Mark: “Hey, aren’t you a multi-instrumentalist?”
Matt, smugly: “Yes, I am.”

Adam: “I’d like to think #5 was in Duran Duran.”
Mark: “Yeah, but we’re doing the Human League…”

Jayne: “#1, did we go to school together?”
Mark: “You didn’t go to school, Jayne. You’re foolin’ no one.”
Jayne: “DAMN!”

This week, instead of Next Lines, Mark gives Opening Lines, and the panel has to give the title of the song.

Mark: “I made it through the wilderness.”
Jayne: “Ah, Madonna.”
Mark: “It is Madonna, but it could be Bill’s autobiography.”

Overall: A bit more consistent than the last few, thanks to a tighter panel. Not the most uproarious, but Matt’s chimp noises, Jayne’s fillet a fox, and some nice lines from Guy and Adam made it pretty worthwhile.

Best Regular: Phill
Best Guest: Jayne
Best Runner: Monkey noises.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s