Nevermind Watchdown S20E1, or BAILEY IN RED…

This is the last spring series NMTB would ever do, before going strictly October-to-Winter from then on. Thankfully, this series has one insane guest per episode, so I think we’ll be in good hands. For instance, tonight’s episode features the one and only ALAN DAVIES!!!

Chris Peck sang lead for Boy Kill Boy. Matt Baker’s a BBC presenter, who used to host Blue Peter. Nerina Pallot is a singer-songwriter.

Simon jokes that he nearly didn’t re-sign for another series, “but, eventually, my demands were met.” And then his chair rises mechanically, like a James Bond villain chair.

Simon, introing Nerina: “Nerina says that 30 is the new 21. Oh, Nerina. If only that were how the pop charts worked…”

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Chris, on Gwen Stefani above, “I still think she looks like Kiefer Sutherland from the Lost Boys. She’s got the whole of the Lost Boys around her, as well…”
Phill: “And Ronaldo, from Man United…”

Simon keeps arguing with Alan about standards, and Alan jokes that the questions are too easy.
Simon: “This show maybe isn’t so highbrow, but we like to say, ohh, ‘Robbie Williams is a tit!’ THAT’S WHAT PEOPLE LIKE!”
Alan: “He’s not a tit, he’s quite nice…”
Simon: “Robbie Williams?”
Alan: “Yeah.”
Simon: “Ohhhh, you lose a point!”

Simon: “Pink apparently got her name when she showed her friend her lady parts, to which she said ‘oh, it’s pink’. That’s also how Scary got her name. And Ginger.”
I’ll say this about Simon- at least he keeps the Spice Girls slams coming.

As one of Bill’s answers involves lewd behavior, Simon asks Matt: “Was there ever any lewd behavior on the set of Blue Peter?”
Bill: “Did it ever get BLUE Peter?”

Matt: “Yeah, Blue Peter always moves on with the times.”
Nerina: “Isn’t it [making] crack pipes, now?”
Phill: “This week, Konnie’s going to fashion a crude bong! Out of an orange and some straws!”
Bill: “We’ve, uh, hollowed out a tortoise…”

Simon: “Nerina toured with James Blunt, didn’t you? That must have been fun.”
Nerina: “It was an interesting experience, yeah.”
Simon: “Are you not gonna give us any anecdotes tonight?”
Bill: “When you say it was an interesting experience, is that a euphemism for ‘oh, it was horrible.'”
Simon: “Is that what you were thinking, Nerina?”
Nerina, genuine: “I’ve thought….some things.”

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Simon’s befuddled reaction

Nerina, then, ashamed, goes : “I thought I was going on Countdown!”
Bill: “Nerina, you can slag off anyone you’d like, anyone with impunity. I’ll start off. D’you here this, the other day on Loose Ends? Chris DeBurgh slagged me off. Ned, he goes ‘MMM, D’YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT BILL BAILEY?” And he goes “YES. I’VE HEARD HE’S VERY UGLY. And he HASN’T GOT MUCH HAAAIIR…”
Phill: “Is that all that the troll had to work with? Chris DeBurgh, mono-browed freak monster”
Nerina: “…I can’t follow that.”
Bill: “Sure you can. Say something about James Blunt.”
Alan, coaxing her: “What’s it rhyme with?”

Matt: “You know, I could give you another anecdote about ice and falling into it.”
Simon: “He’s got every anecdote under the sun…AND YOU SIT HERE WITH NOTHING, PALLOT!”

Alan, after the first intro: “When you see this on the telly, it’s a lot less frightening than it is here. When they’re looming over you doing that. I’ve never seen someone so desperate for me to know something…since me last show with Stephen Fry.”
Phill, doing his Stephen Fry impression: “OHHHH Come on, Alan, you know! OH, ALAN MY DARLING, tell me the answer!”

I think this is interesting- this is a different Alan than the one that was on back in Season One. This one knows who he is, and is a bit older.

Bill asks Matt if CityHospital is a real thing, or a soap opera. He explains it’s just people going round a hospital and interviewing patients. Bill gives him some crap for that.

Later, Phill screws with Bill by just singing “Bailey in Reeeeddd…’ as he’s trying to do an intro.
Simon: “Next on City Hospital…6 people stabbed by Bill Bailey…in a Chris DeBurgh related incident…”

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Phill, on the ID Parade of Mortys: “HALLO…AND WELCOME TO ALBANIAN GRAND PRIX. Number Four will be DRIVING TRAIN.”
Alan: “These are the five most bored looking men I’ve ever seen. They’ve been waiting at a bus stop for three years”

Chris: “Two’s got that narrow eyed stare about him.”
Phill: “He’s got that ‘kill the fat bloke’ stare…”

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The scariest looking ID Parade guy ever

Bill: “I saw this film called Wrong Turn, right…’We don’t get many drivers com in’ this way…'”
Simon goes to try and ‘normalize’ the guy, but just messes up his hair.

Nerina: “You’d appreciate this, but #2 is rather cute.”
Simon: “I WOULD appreciate that, BECAUSE I….AM A HOMOSEXUAL!”
Nerina: “No, I mean they won’t know that-”
Bill: ‘WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE WON’T KNOW? We don’t have to…go into the paddock to ride the horses!”

The panel decides on #2
Nerina: “He doesn’t look screwed-up enough, though…”
Matt, deadpan: “Shall we go for #5, then?”
CUT BACK TO 5, GLARING HORRIFYINGLY! My god, this is hysterical. He’s the new Athleston, I take it.

Simon: “Once upon a time I was falling in love”
Bill: “[cough] NOW I’M ONLY [cough] falling apart!”

Overall: Great show to bring us into S20. With the exception of a quieter Chris, the whole panel was on. Nerina got the most shit from Simon, but Alan had the funniest game, while Matt had some great lines, and seemed to have a ball. The running gags kept coming, and there was enough material to keep it fresh all the way through. Plus, the regulars seemed to be in position, and the feel was pretty relaxed and even.It’s a shame things are so quiet now, because I have a feeling the next episode’s going to be ruthless and insane.

Best Regular: Bill
Best Guest: Alan
Best Runner: Nerina’s lack of anecdotes, or Chris DeBurgh.

QI Watchdown: H7 (Horrible)

Brilliant, another Halloween episode. Not only is this another Sean Lock episode, our third and final one of the season,  but this one features Dara O’Briain, and tonight he’s brought along one of my favorite MTW regulars, Chris “There’s a Robin on the Corner of the Building!” Addison. Man, this will be fun.

All the buzzers are, true to theme, horrible sounds. Chris’ is a “EUUUUGHHH!”, which cracks him up. Sean’s is someone flat out vomiting. His response is priceless:

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‘Lovely…just lovely”

Alan’s, continuing the horrible theme, is just someone going “hello, I’m Piers Morgan.” Works well enough, I think.

Sean, on where the parasite lives: “I think it lives on something that’s long.”
Stephen: “Well…”
Sean: “Something with a lot of blood in it….maybe a couple of veins….to give it a bit of purchase, because if it was long and smooth it’d slide right down-”

Stephen: “I agree with Sean that it’s a slidey organ, a sort of wet organ-”
Alan: “The hell are you looking at me for???”

Screen Shot 2016-05-11 at 1.14.06 AMSean on the snot-flower: “I’ve coughed something like that once….that looks a bit like KFC.”
Chris: “Tempura.”
Sean, chuckling: “TEMPURA? That’s so middle class!”

Stephen: “What sort of length do you think the average tapeworm is.”
Sean: “EIGHT METERS.” (I laughed at this for some reason.)
Chris: “Fourteen miles.”
Stephen: “Fourteen miles is perhaps a little long. But thank you for joining in.”

Stephen: “What is the key ingredient in the world’s nastiest cocktail?”
Sean: “Malibu.”
Sean: “I RECKON…I reckon you’ve got someone up there who’s a really quick typer!”

Stephen talks about the Toe Cocktails in canada, that have a human toe in them. Dara’s delivery of “WHERE DO THEY GET THE TOE?” makes me laugh, and the fact that Stephen’s ready with that on the next slide.

Screen Shot 2016-05-11 at 2.04.21 PMSean is distracted by the guy in the middle, when talking about the toe cocktail. “He probably thinks it’s hilarious. I can imagine him going “HE HE…YOU’RE GONNA HAVE TA DRINK THE TOE!”‘, and Sean does that in this high, southern voice.

Stephen’s next question is ‘give me one reason to put a frog’s bottom in your mouth.” And then this comes up on the screen:
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Alan has no choice but to look behind him in absolute disbelief.
Stephen: “Do you remember posing for that?”
Alan: “I remember that…what a night that was! You should see what I’ve got in my hands!”

Stephen talks about sucking water from a frog’s bottom to gain hydration in the desert.
Dara: “Essentially, it’s a Capri-Sun.”
Sean: “Or, just get a straw, and you can make a hole wherever you want!”

On how you get rid of a leech:
Alan: “You don’t wanna rip them off, do you?”
Stephen: “Why not?”
Alan: “Doesn’t that do more damage, or leave bits of them in you or something?”
In a millisecond, Alan sees Stephen’s reaction coming, and, knowing exactly what’s coming,  immediately goes “It’s gonna turn out to be ripping them off-”
Alan: “All right, BURN it off.”
Alan: “Douse it in some sort of vulgar…whiskey spirit or something.”
Stephen: “You’re safe with that one.”

Stephen talks about a people being covered in leeches in surgery, for personal aid.
Dara: “I hope the leech guy, in the surgery, dresses differently than the rest of the operational staff. I hope the leech guy arrives like the Child Catcher, in a fancy hat with leeches hanging off it. And then he arrives in, “HEELLOOOO, I AM THE LEECH MAN!”

Stephen asks what a horrible way of transporting smallpox vaccines was, and behind him, a picture of Marty Feldman from Young Frankenstein appears.
Chris: “Was it via Marty Feldman?”

During the conversation about smallpox being protected.
Dara: “I’m sorry, this whole thing feels like we’re in the opening scene of an apocalypse movie.”
Chris: “But don’t worry, it’s in THIS test tube, nothing can-” [drops it]

Completing a house guidebook: “Never rub your eyes, except with your…”
Dara: “Frog.”
Chris: “Other eye.”
And then Chris tries to demonstrate how to rub his eye with the other eye.

Another one has a line about Germans having a gloating zeal in _____
Chris: “A gloating zeal enclosure?” He puts on his usual German accent and goes “This es my Gloating Zeal! I HAVE ZE BIGGEST ROCK! HAHAHAA!”
Stephen, after a confused beat: “…It could be that…”

The answer ends up being that Germans have a gloating zeal in collecting salacious postcards.
Alan: “I love that these were the warnings given, pre-2-World-Wars. ‘Previously known for collecting salacious postcards, later for exterminating millions!”

Sean: “I’m guessing that seriously violent criminals are amazing at sex.”
Stephen: “Are they?”
Sean: “I dunno, I’m just guessing.”
Alan: “Or at least they say they are…”
Sean: “I imagine they’re quite horny, just…RRRRR….”
Chris: “….on a moped.”

Stephen’s next question, ‘Name a Pizza Topping that eats insects”, leads to this visual:
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Dara is now very confused. He goes “Don’t know why I get to be…MARIO in this situation.”

The first question of GI is “where does a snake’s tail begin.” There’s ten seconds of silence.
Sean: “After its bottom.”
And just for the hell of it, he bangs his puke buzzer.

Sean, upon learning of his -33 score, instead doing his usual ‘thank you’, goes “…WHAT?…WHAT??”

Overall: A solid episode, though without too many huge moments. All four were having a good time, though Dara and Chris were quieter than I would have liked, even though Chris had some very good answers. Alan had another on-day, and Sean made a case for yet another career-defining series.

MVP: Sean
Best Guest: Sean
Show Winner: Dara
Best QI Fact: Toe Cocktail

QI Watchdown: H6 (Happiness)

How appropriate. An episode called ‘Happiness’, and a panel of three people that make me very happy indeed.

The show made a grand success last year by putting Phill and Andy together, and had a less applauded success by putting Phill and Rich together. No sign of an Andy-Rich combo, though.

Tonight’s episode-long runner concerns the audience ‘pleasure gauge’, like the ‘noise-o-meter’ at a sporting event. The meter hits its highest (with laughs), and somebody on the panel gets a bonus point.

Stephen: “What would make Britain a happier place?”
Andy: “Hope?”
Stephen: “The Pope?”
Andy: “No, HOPE, not the Pope!”
Stephen: “I was gonna say, that seemed odd.”
Alan: “I thought you said a GROPE!”
Stephen: “A grope of the Pope-”

Alan: “I think moving us slightly south in order to improve the weather would make us happier-”
Phill: “Could you do that by just putting an outboard motor on Aberdeen?”
Rich: “You’re never in the same latitude. Britain just keeps cruising the globe. Like Somali Pirates…”

Alan: “Give everyone the mental age of six…”
Andy: “Well, the media are working on that, aren’t they?”
Huge audience response.

Stephen: “I mean, six-year olds cry 70 or 80 times a day”
Alan: “Yeah, because they can’t go up and down stairs without falling. Whereas I can.”
Phill: “70 or 80 times- WHERE IS this lachrymose six year old??? What does Uncle Stephen do???”
Stephen: “I try to teach them Latin, I just…”
Alan: “‘not the british museum, agaaainn!”
Stephen: “…don’t…”

Stephen talks about the ‘Make Slough Happy’ campaign
Rich: “I think one of the important things would be to get rid of the name ‘Slough’.”
Stephen: “I fear you’re right. It’s not a very happy name, is it?”
Alan: “Yeah, change it to ‘YIPPEE!'”

Phill talks about trying not to laugh at a mine disaster in the Wanky Colliery
Rich: “It’s like a headline I read in Ireland once- ‘Cork Man Drowns'”
THAT is why Rich Hall is still hysterical. Heck, he even gets a bonus Pleasure Gauge point.
Rich: “You know what…his name was Bob. COME ON!”
Even more applause. At this point all the applause just annoys him.
Rich: “Well…I think I’ve won this. I’m not gonna answer another question.”

Stephen: ‘But how many real friends do you have?”
Rich: “Just one. James Taylor.”
Phill bursts out laughing.

Andy: “Four. Actually, I’m not sure about him. Because he once spiked my drinks and stole my trousers when I was…he’s coming off the list, yeah.”
Phill: “Which d’he do first?”
And Phill holds this jackass-like expression, just getting Andy’s goat.

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This exact jackass expression

Andy just looks at him and goes, like he’s an idiot, “drinks first, Phill”, and goes back to his notes. The Phill-Andy dynamic is actually a pretty good one, only touched on briefly in Gallimaufrey, when Andy stole Phill’s identity for a round.

Stephen: “How can you tell if a friend is really pleased to see you?”
Alan: “They will….be engorged…”
Stephen: “You know 150 people that become engorged at the sight of you?”
Alan: “I know THOUSANDS…”
Phill: “I know Alan well enough for a light twitch…”
Alan: ‘You’re not in my 150, bruv…”

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Stephen describes this set of photos from a guy trying to find sincerity in smiling by wiring people to smile when they didn’t want to.

Alan: “These are all the QI researchers. Bending over backwards for the show.”

Andy: “Second one from the bottom, he looks like the bloke’s coming in from a different side. He’s been surprised.”
Phill: “Actually, Andy, there is a third probe you can’t see…”

Phill: “I imagine they gave them names, like ‘Fifty Eight, I forgot my mother’s birthday!’ ‘Sixty One, left the gas on!'”
Alan: “That’s not ‘left the gas on’. That’s ‘trod on a cat and it’s died.'”

Stephen: “The Duchenne smile, with only the mouth and not the eyes, is known by people who study this as-”
Alan: “A Gordon Brown.”

On how there’s no tipping in Singapore: “There used to be signs in the little rickshaws and things that said ‘no tipping’.”
Phill: “That’s like something drunk students do. Rickshaw Tipping.”
And then…Stephen gives Phill this look.

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With a subtle little purr attached to it.

And then literally everyone looks at Stephen. Phill’s feeling kind of gratified.
Alan: “That came out out loud, Stephen.”
Stephen: “I’m sorry, I didn’t-”
Andy: “We were all thinking it, but you said it!”

Stephen: “Why was everybody in the world expected to die laughing in 1910?”
Andy: “Was Michael McIntire going on tour?”
Alan: “That IS Arthur Smith on the far right…”

Rich’s story of John McCririck falling out of a boat is a pretty nice one, especially the part where he just gets back in the boat and says “alright, where were we?”, like nothing happened.

Stephen: “So, the bees, they…suck on your misery.”
(Phill laughs)
Stephen: “What, don’t look at me like that!  It sounded rather poetic when it came into my head!”
Phill: “There’s your cue to make your first Heavy Metal album, and you have to call it…suck on my misery.”

The show’s sort of slowing down in the last half, but there’s still some great stuff going around.

Stephen asks what dictates a convincing laugh.
Alan, channeling Johnny Vegas: “Ice cube in the anus.”
Stephen: “….RIGHT. Yeah, that might do SOMETHING…”
Alan: “It’ll make you laugh. Try it later.”

Stephen: “What is the five-pound note made of?”
Alan: “….PAPER.”
Alan: “Let’s just get that one out of the way…”

Overall: Fell off toward the end, but overall a pretty nice episode. Only Andy really stood out, as Phill and Rich gave their usual performances with a few standout lines. Andy’s become very good at weathering a packed QI panel, and Alan had a much more prominent show than his last few.

MVP: Andy
Best Guest: Phill
Show Winner: Phill
Best QI Fact: Bentham’s Front Lawn

QI Watchdown: H5 (H-Animals), or I’ll Come at ya like a nun!

The bad news is that tonight’s episode features Ruby Wax, a US-born TV personality that people are saying is incredibly annoying.

The good news is Sean Lock and Ross Noble are here to cancel that annoyingness out. So I think we’ll be fine.

Stephen gives the panel 2 points for every horned animal they can think of. So Ruby just riles off this long list, including joke answers, that just steers the episode to a halt right off the bat. There is a point, however, where she turns to Sean and says “did I say that one already”, and Sean just has this look of absolute disgust.

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Sean, praying for sweet release from Ruby Wax

Eventually the cycle of cacophony is halted when Ruby guesses ‘unicorn’, and gets a klaxon. However, immediately after, Alan guesses ‘rhino’ and gets one himself.

Ross: “What about a Viking Dog…cause it would have the horns!”
More evidence that Ross Noble saves latter-era QI.

Stephen tells the story of the 18th century nun who grew a horn by banging her head on the cell repeatedly. Ross, in response, says “I’M DOIN’ IT NOW!” and starts banging his head on the desk.

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Ross, trying to grow a horn

Ross, going on: “What she should have done, is had a bible with a hook on it, put it [on her head] and you’d be peeling potatoes, reading the bible! Cause you’ll have that on QVC! ‘Are you sick of not being able to read the bible as doing domestic duties? Try banging yer head off a wall! It works for nuns! 8 out of 10 nuns prefer it!'”
(I find it funny that as soon as he said the ‘8 out of 10′ line, they cut to Sean. Thaaaat was good)

Stephen says the difference between horns and antlers is antlers “are shed every year”
Sean: “So what do they keep in this shed? They keep their antlers in a shed?”
Stephen: “No, not IN a shed”
Sean, blankly to the audience: “I know so little.”

Ross: “So when the two horn creatures are goin’ at it, when they lock horns…does that ever happen to nuns? ‘That’s not your bible, that’s my bible!”
Stephen: “I’d walk a mile on broken glass to see that…”
Ross: “I’d also pay to hump them as well…”

A bit of the way through, Ruby notes that she’s never heard someone talk like Ross, in a Geordie accent, which amuses Stephen and Ross.
Ross: “I’d just like to point out…I’m actually on the show, I’m not on the screen…You just saw me and went ‘what the hell is that thing?”
Ruby: “The way you bent your head-”
Ross: “I’ll come at’ya like a nun!”
Sean: “That’s one of the worst threats I’ve ever heard…’like a nun’. “Would you like a sweet?””

Stephen asks what would happen if you pushed a hippo into the deep end of a swimming pool.
Ross: “It’s not the first thing that would happen. The first thing that would happen was you’d get your swimming card revoked.”
Sean: “But also, Ross, I think there’d be a huge sense of relief, that you finally got the hippo…you’d got through the turnstiles with it, through the changing rooms…and you think ‘Ah, Christ, at least I’ve bloody done it!”…probably take the traffic cone of your head.”

Stephen points out that hippos can’t swim. Alan points out the BBC clip of the hippos swimming in a circle (previously referenced by Russell Howard on Mock the Week), and Stephen points out that it couldn’t have been true.
Sean: “A lot of Eastenders isn’t true, either.”

(On how hippos can reach the surface)
Sean: “They can’t use a ladder!”
Ross: “You said that with anger. Like…’bloody hippos’. You’ve paid a few of ’em to do some decorating. And they just sat ’round smoking, and you went “…can’t even use a bloody ladder!”

Ruby has moved on from sharks and talks about swimming with dolphins. “Sometimes disabled kids will go in, and they’ll sort of-”
Sean: “With sharks???”
Ruby: “…NOT with sharks…”
Stephen: “With dolphins, we’re talking-”
Sean: “Oh, sorry… I thought you were throwing disabled kids in with sharks. I was going ‘WHAT SORT OF CHARITY IS THIS????”

Ross sees the video of a hagfish secreting slime when hampered with.
Ross: “I think my daughter, then, might be a hagfish. Cause THAT’S NOTHING! To be honest, I’ve got that on me trousers…every morning.”

Ross: “Given the choice, if I had to have special powers, I’d like to be bitten by one of them , cause Spider Man just does a bit of climbing and all that, but imagine if you just…sat in a chair, somebody went ‘do your thing’ and you just went ‘bleeeahhhh’.”
Ross is fantastic this episode, and he’s having so much fun with this hagfish bit.

Sean: “But, Ross, superheroes are meant to HELP people. How would you HELP people with this mucus?”
Ross: “Oh, there’s a child who’s got his head stuck in the railings! ‘fffhhhmmm…”
Sean: “Yeah, that’s a really good comic book story, isn’t it??”
Ross: “Or, OH, This gravy is unnecessarily runny! ‘fffhhhmmmm…”
Stephen: “This couple is dry-humping!”
Ross: ‘EXACTLY!”

Alan: “I’d rather have hippo powers. Cause you’re bulletproof, you can run at 35 miles per hour, and you can walk at the bottom of the deep end. AND, you only have to brush 4 teeth in the morning.”
Ross: “The only problem with that is your arch nemesis, LOCK-BOY, pushes you into a swimming pool!”

Ross: “I’m just saying, if that humpback whale got the flu, and he’s taking up all the chairs [in the waiting room], and all the pensioners and me are pressed against the wall-”
Alan: “Are we gonna have to encourage the whales to ring NHS direct?”
Ross: “The only trouble with that is NHS direct pick up the phone, and they think it’s a fax machine.”
And then Ross does an impression of a humpback whale on the telephone, which I legitimately laughed at.
Ross: “Wrong number again. And he’s there going “I’m really ill! And they won’t let me come into the doctor’s because I take up too much room, and I keep knocking the posters off the wall with me barnacle arse!”

Stephen: “You’re taking a hamster on holiday. How do you make sure he doesn’t get jet-lagged?”
Ross: “Holiday in England!”
Where was this guy the first 7 seasons???

Stephen asks what the most aggressive mammal is.
Ruby: ‘A rhino’
Stephen: “No, rhinos aren’t very aggressive at all.”
Sean: “They also aren’t mammals, either.”
Stephen: “Yes they are.”
Stephen: “I thought it was a dinosaur.”

Stephen says the Honey Badger is most aggressive of mammals.
Sean: “So why aren’t they in charge, then? Why are we in charge, and not them.”
Stephen: “Because we temper our aggression with altruism, with knowledge, with cognitive faculty-”
Sean: “No, Stephen, it’s BOMBS.”

The whole episode, there’s a running gag with Sean, whenever he brings up an animal fact that’s wrong, he says that he’s getting them from Jordan on a headset. There’s moment where he’s just giving the straight feed, and Ruby looks at him with the same confused look that he gave her earlier. Great full circle stuff.

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Now you know how it feels

Ross wins tonight, which is pretty cool. Sean, in second, does his usual ‘thank you’, and is credited as ‘Sean Lock and Jordan!’ Thanks to Ruby, at least Alan doesn’t end up in last.

Overall: After a pair of dull episodes, Series H is back on track, thanks to a pretty solid episode punctured by a slower finish. the first half of this episode, by the way, is electric, and gave so much great material, between Sean pushing hippos into the pool, Ross and the mucus, and the nuns with horns. Ross had a career night and proved his worth as a panelist, and Sean found himself back to his usual tricks after a slower go a few episodes ago. Alan had a quieter night, though had some nice lines here and there. Ruby was just wrong for QI, and wasn’t especially funny or added anything.

MVP: Ross
Best Guest: Sean
Show Winner: Ross
Best QI Fact: Morphing Madagascar species
Best Runner: Sean pushing hippos into the pool.