Nevermind Watchdown: S14E9

I’m actually excited for this one because Adam Duritz, lead singer of Counting Crows, shows up, and he’s one of those guys I wasn’t expecting on Buzzcocks anytime soon…Unfortunately, in this episode, brought back on our quest for the lost episodes, he’s the only one I’ve heard of.

WOWW…Hell of a joke to start with. Mark starts typing, on a word doc on his laptop, a fake young girl profile, saying ‘she’ likes Ponies, and Busted.
Mark: “It’s not what it looks like, we’re just trying to get R. Kelly on the show.”
BILL’S ENTIRE PANEL WINCES after that one.

WAIT A MINUTE…MARTHA REEVES, of Martha and the Vandellas, is here??? My god, that’s fantastic!! What’s SHE doing here as well?

Raghav is a solo pop-star.Lynsey Brown was a member of pop-girl-group Clea.

Bill, on Art Garfunkel: “Look at this guy. Big ol’ forehead, hair all bunched up on the back of his head.”
CUT TO ADAM AND BILL.
Mark: “You’re an Art Garfunkel tribute! If only i were hearing the Sound of Silence every week…”

Bill, after a shot of ‘a robot emerging from Art’s head’, “R2D2 dressed as a Chinese rice paddy worker…”
Mark: “Oh, is that what you meant? ART-ooD2?”
Bill: “No…oh, YEAH, I s’pose…”
Mark: “R’oo’Dee’oo. The West Country Star Wars. ‘Arright, Arr-Do!”
Bill: “OH-HO. The force es strong ‘un this’un.”

Mark, to Adam after Martha and Bill’s first intro: “It’s a nightmare, isn’t it? Because you’re sat there, going ‘wow, I’m watching Martha Reeves perform live…WHO’S THIS GIT IN BETWEEN???”

And then, after Bill and Martha’s re-do of the intro turns into a wurzels-esque horn thing: “I’ve never been so happy about a double act since East and West Germany reunited.”

Mark: “Daniel Bedingfield claims his album is what would happen if Sting, Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson shared a basement together. I haven’t got the album, so I’ll just have to imagine a blind bloke and a Geordie kicking the shit out of a paedophile.”
BRA. VO. MARK.

Mark, after the joke’s HUGE reaction, to Martha: “You’re friends with Stevie Wonder, right? He could beat Michael Jackson in a punch-up.”
Martha, bluntly: “…he’d probably beat him to death.”
Phill ABSOLUTELY LOSES IT at this, and Mark even nods, “yeah…”
Phill: “And the thing is, it wouldn’t be quick, would it?”

Lynsey, before intros: “All of these have to have been done before 1990.”
Mark: “They’ve gotta be done BEFORE 1990? The word you were looking for was AFTER, wasn’t it?”
Lynsey: “I have been time-traveling, with Bill!”
Mark: “No, I think you just said that so blind people would know you were blonde…”
Lynsey, putting her hand up Kerry Katona style: “Whatever…”
Mark: “What, ‘talk to the hand’? Cause the face can’t understand words…”

Phill does an intro through his hands, to Lynsey.
Lynsey: “You can do it louder.”
Phill: “Thanks! ( highest decibel) BAAAAHHH- BAAAH BAAHH…”

Raghav: “I’m sorry, but I’ve never heard of the Happy Clappers either.”
Mark: “That’s okay. You think they’re all standing there going ‘HEY! THAT’S RAGHAV!”

Nice twist for Bill’s ID Parade- they have to pick out the dog from David Gray’s Be Mine video. So, knowing Bill’s animal fixation, this should be fun.

Mark gives all the dogs Spice Girls names. The second he goes “is it #5, Geri Halliwell”, both 2 and 5 run towards the cameras, cracking up most of the panel.

Screen Shot 2016-07-07 at 12.26.11 AM

Mark: “I think that the loveliest thing is, on a Motown night, all five trainers are going ‘STOP IN THE NAME OF LOVE! The worst Supremes tribute act you’ll ever see in your life…”
Martha’s absolutely losing it now.

After Lynsey meekishly responded to her own next lines, and after Adam and Martha did the same on their side.
Mark: “Everyone’s scared of their own lyrics tonight…”
Adam: “They’re scary!”
Mark flips a card over, screams, then flips it back.

Overall: Lighter than most of Series 14, but not without merit. Martha Reeves being in a good mood was one of the best parts, even if the rest of the panel, save for some Lynsey arguing, was mostly quiet. Heck, some of the best moments came from the interplay within the regulars.

Best Regular: Mark
Best Guest: Martha
Best Runner: Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder

 

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