The Mole Australia Watchdown: S01E04, or Whoever Invented This One was a Sadistic Fuck

Well, Rocky’s gone, so there went my will to live. Still, further down the stretch we go, toward another episode. Hopefully there’ll be more than one man left by the end of it.

The beginning of this episode is just Grant restating the extent of the sabotage/suspicion on each cast member’s head.

Grant, for Alan, says “he lingers in the background, and is rarely noticed.” I blame the editors for that.

Grant: “Jan…army trained and completely determined to succeed.”
(Cut to Jan completely fouling up the tire in E2)

After this…sort of unnecessary bit, Grant asks for two female guides, who are…almost unanimously chosen as Linda and Jan.

Also, the phrase “could you two please go see Snowy at the timber yard’ was supposed to be taken seriously…but I can’t stop laughing.

The task for the other two, which is odd, is to catch 8 kilograms of fish on the water. The whole ‘eight kilograms’ bit confuses the hell out of Ben.

Bev and Jo just go and use fishing rods, while the other three legitimately have to fill out a fishing license. You don’t see this much stationery law work on the US version.

Jan and Linda, meanwhile, have to construct a raft capable of holding up to five people, only using rope and wood.
Colby Donaldson, from three continents over: ‘So not only does it have to carry Bev, and Alan, and Ben, and any NORMAL PERSON….but it’s gotta carry 260 pounds of MOLE!”

Even worse, Jo is having difficulties fishing, as she’s a strict vegetarian. I’m sorry, but Josephine has had more moral quandaries in four episodes than most people do in a lifetime. She can’t skydive, she can’t golf, and now she can’t even catch a fish? This is reaching Crystal Cox levels of ineptitude (and yes, this is the 2nd Survivor reference I’ve made this post.)

Bev, explaining to the driver: “We’re gonna catch fish, but keep them alive!”
The incredibly amused driver: “…catch fish ‘n keep ’em alive, eh?’

MORE WITH CONTINENTAL LAWS! The players have to ask Mario, the driver, if they’re actually allowed to catch fish in this trout farm, and we get camera footage of the guy making a phone call. They wouldn’t show this on the US version, making it pretty amusing here.

Eventually, Mario reveals that they’re allowed to go in, but they’re not allowed to use rods. Sort of like this series now that Rocky’s been eliminated.

Mario, explaining how they can do this: “and you CAN use…”, and he pulls out a big net.
Josephine: “…..that thing.”
Bev: “….aw, shit, can we REALLY?”
Bev, as inept as she can be, is a great loose-cannon, natural quote provider.

Jan, as she’s building the raft: “What’s this got to do with girl guiding, that’s what I’d like to know…”
Linda: “I’m not used to being a girl guide…”
Jan: “Me either.”
Linda: “…I was kissing the boys at the back of the shed.”
Jan’s great at just pointing out how ridiculous this show can get. She has this very Moby-on-NMTB-esque way of just adding levity and logic to this…highly illogical situation.

Alan, after he’s forced to throw horribly-smelling fish guts onto a bait thing in massive heat: “This sucks…who ever invented this one was a sadistic fuck…”
Alan’s probably gonna replace Rocky as the makeshift quote provider now.

The image of Josephine trying to net fish inside a trout farm is…true to form, absolutely ridiculous, and Jo is just absolutely struggling. She’s screaming and bobbing around as the fish are all around her, while Grant explains that just 4 of the fish would give them the eight kilos, but they’ve been out their for 30 minutes. Gotta love Josephine.

Linda, seeing Jan’s test run of the raft: “…holy shit, how are we gonna fit five people on that?”

They cut back to Jan and Bev, and they’re already out of bait. Just then do fish actually start swimming into the net, which Grant points out, suspiciously. The cutback to the other three features Alan just exhaustedly falling off of the boat. Great moments in patheticness so far.

This isn’t the greatest challenge, as a lot of it just footage of people fishing, but it’s nice to see Abby, Alan and Ben absolutely failing at this challenge.

I love the shot where Mario is praising the girls for catching two large fish, and we zoom in on Josephine’s horrified expression. Man, she’s not having the best game, is she?

Alan ends up taking a huge hit by getting incredibly seasick in his multiple boat trips back and forth, and he ends up not being able to grab the craypot in the end.

Even worse, right as Alan, Ben and Abby are about to get back to the harbor with their (minuscule) fish, the boat’s engine stops entirely. Jesus, these guys have had horrible luck this round. Luckily, Jo and Bev show up to just take their cargo to the harbor.

The cumulative grab is 8.5, so they win the challenge, but I think the real winner of that one was that adorable little beagle who kept trying to eat all the fish.

After this challenge, Jan and Linda put their raft on the side and all 7 go on a sailing trip, which is a pretty nice touch. Also, because of the raft subplot, Jan and Linda don’t have to take part in the next challenge.

The challenge, which Grant says is ‘very simple’, is for the five to swim out to Sara Island and stay there, on the beaches, until 6 AM. If at any point someone wants out, they can use a phone and get the game’s FIRST EXEMPTION, as well as a nice stay at a nearby hotel, but they rid the group of the 10,000.

Grant: “And dinner tonight will be the fish you caught today.”
Cut to Josephine wanting to die.

Jan: “So, if the mole calls in, that the way of the mole going straight through…”
Abby: “…the mole’s already gonna go straight through…”

They do come up with a nice plan- Alan will keep the phone, and Ben will keep the battery, so if somebody calls, they’ll ALL know.

Great little moment. Alan, Jo and Bev are by the beach, and Bev takes off her sweater for warmth. At that exact moment, Josephine follows Alan down the beach. There is no way this wasn’t strategic of Jo.

Grant: “They’re allowed a stove, but no open fires.”
Cut to Alan accidentally starting a huge, blazing fire.

This isn’t the greatest challenge, and there’s a lot of squabbling and suffering, so it sort of drags the pace of what was already a pretty nice episode.

I’m guessing that this is Bev’s last stand, as she’s coughing and wheezing during her on-island confessional.

There’s eventually a quandary over whether Bev should get the exemption or not, as Bev immediately wants to stay when she hears it’s risking money, but there’s still some question over it.

Ben’s questioning whether Bev is actually sick. Dude…Beverly was the only one who had the fish, and is now suffering from extreme food poisoning. Screw the fact that she was ‘fit as a fiddle before’. Food poisoning happens.

6:00 eventually comes around, and even though they’re all miserable, they all make it through and 10,000 goes into the kitty. Then…they have to use that aforementioned raft to make it back.

Jan and Linda get to watch from the raft. Linda, with binoculars, looks at the other 5 from the island. After a few beats, she looks back toward Jan. “Bev’s in her undies!”

Linda: “It’s floating…”
Jan, apathetically: “…yay team.”
Linda: “…so far.”

The object is to make sure that none of the players get wet above the chest. So…when Josephine pushes Bev into the water as they head into deeper waters…maybe that’s a TIIIIINY BIT SUSPICIOUS. Josephine’s been piling up a LOT lately, to be honest.

As the gang is shuttled back to shore.
Grant: “Little trouble with the raft there, eh?”
Alan: “…LITTLE BIT?”

Pre-quiz. This one was slightly more even, as we got a lot of Alan stuff, a lot of Abby and Josephine, but people like Jan and Linda were given the shaft thanks to their role in the day. Still, I’ll say that people like Ben, Abby and Linda deserve to stick around.

Who do I think is going home? Once again, I think Beverly’s going home. She’s completely exhausted. If not her, Jan?

Josephine: RED. WHOA.

I…honestly thought she was either sticking around, or, the Mole. This episode gave her a lot more balanced material, and I didn’t see her boot coming. Still, this was a long time coming, and she was one of the clumsier, harder to deal with players here, but part of me will miss her a bit.

Overall: Strong start, but a whopper of a final challenge brings this one down a few pegs. A lot of good character stuff, and this one actually made me sad for Josephine when she left, because there were so many silly character moments of hers.

Best Gameplayer: Abby. She’s actually beginning to impress me.
Best Character: This episode, Jan. She was cracking a lot of jokes back with Linda.
Who do I think is the mole? This is tough. My main suspect for this ep. just went home. Abby I don’t think is the mole anymore. Bev it can’t be. I’m beginning to think it could be Ben.


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