Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S03E33, or Did You Hear the Nose-THE NEWS?

The Chip shows in S3 have honestly been more similar to the ones in S2 than I’d thought- there’s fewer of them than other fourth-seaters, a lot of them are significantly better than other tapings, and Chip’s utilized pretty well. The reason there’s so few this season is because the third Chip taping of S3 was pushed to S4 due to concerns over A.) censorship and B.) Ryan falling ill mid-taping, and showing it.

This Chip taping gave us a gem in episode 2, and a solid, if middling, show in E16. And now we see what the taping had left, keeping in mind that we’ve still got a great runner-based show coming next season from this taping.

Superheroes: No More Bee-Gees
Colin: Disco Boy
Ryan: Captain Hummingbird
Chip: The Lap Dance Kid
Wayne: The Barroom Brawler

1000 points to the quick-thinking audience member who shouted ‘No More Bee-Gees’. Ryan was even impressed by that, as was Drew, who wrote it down almost immediately

Drew slightly alters his intro, saying “each guy will try to screw the other guy by naming them-”
Screen Shot 2019-12-26 at 11.15.23 AM.png

Colin has his first genius move immediately. He notices the light’s out, and:
Screen Shot 2019-12-26 at 11.16.33 AM.png
Yes, he unscrews a lightbulb while disco dancing. The applause that follows is warranted. Gotta love Colin. Even the other 3, and Drew, stand and applaud.

Then, to subvert, he moves forward using a walker. Haaah.


I always get a kick out of Ryan blowing a line: “Did you hear the noise-THE NEWS?”, and then trying to do a Gibb-esque high note.

I also love Ryan’s very confused expression when Colin names him Captain Hummingbird.
Screen Shot 2019-12-26 at 11.19.36 AM.png
And Colin just has this shrug which also kills me. At which point Ryan goes right into his hyperactive bird schtick

The image of Ryan fluttering all over the stage and Colin subtly boogieing while trying to think of something is ALSO fantastic

Then, as Chip leaps in, he does so in a motion that startles Ryan and hurts Colin’s leg. Everything in this scene is working. EVERYTHING

Then, Chip lap-dancing against Colin as he does more 70s dance moves. Oh man.

Then, Chip does a direct callback/insult to Ryan: “DID YOU HEAR THE NOSE- THE NEWS?
Screen Shot 2019-12-26 at 11.22.35 AM.png

I also love the dynamic of Wayne, trying to kick everyone’s ass, while Chip is trying to grind against Wayne

Wayne has another astonishingly simple solution. Because of course.

After getting 20 dollars from Colin, Chip leaps off in the exact same way he leapt on

Ryan, at the edge of cracking: “I’m gonna go just because my arms are tired..”

Drew: “…Colin, all the points go to you for that one. When COLIN starts a game out physical, all the others are goin ‘uh oh..”

Probably one of my favorite Superheroes playings ever. The littlest parts of this, like Colin’s shrug, Chip slamming Ryan, and Colin’s old-person switch, elevate even the broad stuff that everyone’s gonna laugh at anyway.

Duet: Chip and Wayne sing a line-dancing song to Kris, an accountant’s assistant

Wayne gets the twang down, and has fun lines like “she likes to assist cause she can’t count for herself”

Chip OBVIOUSLY has this style down, and has some little Georgia Satellites yodel-singing in there as well.

This is an okay Duet, but I feel like Kris dragged it down a bit by being so neutral about the whole thing.

Scenes Cut from a Movie:

The Braveheart scene is a nice experiment in long-form improv- Colin is just unsure about how this is gonna work, and his sort of Scottish reluctance contrasts greatly with the film, and Wayne’s character. It’s one of those where the funny isn’t evident immediately.
Colin: “Okay, okay…I’m not runnin’ anywhere naked…IT’S BLOODY COLD OUT THERE. MAH CABER’LL SHRIVEL UP FASTER THAN…”
Wayne: “It’s alright, I’ll protect Nessie.”

The Exorcist one is much sooner to the point- Wayne’s puking, and Colin’s the angry janitor, going “I’M QUITTING THIS JOB.”

Free Willy also takes a while to get to the joke, as Wayne and Chip take a while getting to a punchline [they cook the whale and sell it for free], so Drew buzzes multiple times.

The Star Wars one is literally just an excuse to do impressions, but they’re good impressions- Wayne’s Lando is always solid, and Chip debuts his spot-on C3P0. Colin’s Chewie is silly enough, and Ryan just comes in for a gag as R2.

Not a great one to finish this game’s run with. Not a lot worked here at all. But Drew’s still doing Billy Dee as they go back to the seats.
Drew: “Hey, Colt 45, gets ’em every time..”
Wayne, as Lando: “One of the galaxy’s FINEST malt beverages…”

Greatest Hits: Songs of the Cowboy v2

Ryan: “Hey, Colin, what’s another name for Cow-poke?”
Screen Shot 2019-12-26 at 11.44.14 AM.pngRyan thankfully clears up that it’s Cowboy: “Besides, you’ve done your time…”

Colin: “Well, as our regular viewers know, I have 8 children, although only three of them are actually mine…[glares at Ryan]”
That silence says it all. I just love their dynamic in this game

I love Colin’s Hanson song title: “MMMMMMMMMM…ooooo.”

Wayne and Chip’s Hanson number is pretty fun, and a good taste of 90s-era teen pop.

I love Wayne unbuttoning his shirt for the grunge number, and keeping his head down

I also love Chip’s Cobain-esque grunty “I HAVEN’T EATEN IN TWO WEEKS” to start the song
Also…damn this one is awesome. Chip has the 90s Seattle grunge bit down, and Laura and Linda have a very Soundgarden/Alice-in-Chains-esque backing track in there

Chip keeps it going, too, leaping off the stage and towards the cameras, and doing some long, Layne-Staley-esque yells

I do think it’s funny that Ryan offered up the title “That Horse Looks Good” as a sort of sexual inclination, but Wayne and Chip took it as ‘we wanna eat the horse’

Colin, post-song: “…I just realized, it wasn’t grunge I was into…”

I love Ryan screwing up and saying it’s a Ballad after already introing a Doo-Wop song, then combining it as a ‘Doo-Wop Ballad’

Chip and Wayne’s doo-wop ballad is a career high for them in this game, I think. It sounds like something they would have put out in that era, and the lyrics are so smartly done. Hell, Wayne even uses the phrase “bustin’ a cap in his ass”, and it still comes off as earnest.

Cut from the same cloth as the GH from E16, quality-wise as well, but They Shot My Pa is a classic number.

Hoedown: Plastic Surgery v2

Like the last version of this, Drew goes for a slam in his verse, saying “at least when he got done with me I didn’t look like Ryan”

Colin’s is about his mother getting so much plastic surgery “her bum is at her neck.”
And immediately after, he just shakes his head and shrugs. He had nothing

Ryan’s, of course, is a rebuttal verse- he gets surgery, “I thought that I might shoot myself because I looked like Drew”

Not as good as the other one from this taping.

Overall: A very, very okay selection of games, with a lot failing to really get a reaction out of me…and, alternatively, an AMAZING Superheroes and that awesome Doo-Wop number in GH. So…a very mixed bag, and the quality is stretched in two different directions. I did like that Chip was in every game tonight, which is rare for him.

Show Winners: Everybody
Best Performer: …hell, I’m giving it to Chip Esten. He boosted the singing games, he was high-energy all night, and his Hoedown was better than Colin’s IMO.
Worst Performer: Wayne was in, and did, the least tonight.
Best Game: HAS to be Superheroes. That one was masterful.
Worst Game: Duet was very average.

COMING UP NEXT: In the essence of…I don’t know what, we go back to Season 2 and take a look at some extra games from Kathy’s first taping, featuring…a LANDMARK Three-Headed Broadway Star

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