Why Aren’t These Whose Line Episodes Available for Streaming?

In the last month or so, as HBO MAX has rolled out their Whose Line package, it’s become cleared that they have the same missing episodes as the CW Seed, and that there is no real resource that has every single ABC episode in good quality, despite marketing saying otherwise.

And yet it’s not exactly clear why these 34 shows aren’t available for streaming, other than…like, greed. So, I’m going to run down each show that isn’t on HBO Max or the Seed and discuss any possible theories that could be holding them back from widespread release, ranging from probable to insane.

I’ll also include a percentage of how suitable for general audiences each show in question is, and if that has anything to do with being kept off streaming.

Season 1:

S01E04: 
Games Played: Weird Newscasters, Duet, Animals, Props, Party Quirks, Scene to Rap, Foreign Film Dub
Fourth Seater: Brad Sherwood
Possible Theories: Foreign Film Dub in Chinese includes an obvious Chinese food joke. Drew has a dirty joke with how his inability to tell the difference between a gazelle and a deer ‘got me in jail’. Maybe Ryan’s Allah joke in Moving People was too much? Or do references to Peyton Place and The Smurfs get them in legal trouble?
% Clean: 85%

S01E05:
Games Played: Let’s Make a Date, Song Styles, Daytime Talk Show, Props, Film Dub, Sportscasters, Hoedown, and Stand Sit Bend
Fourth Seaters: Brad and Karen Maruyama
Possible Theories: Is the Neroshi Song Styles offensive in any way? Is Colin’s Bambi reference in Hoedown a copyright infringement?
% Clean: like 100%. I’d love to hear the rationalization, because this isn’t a very dirty show at all.

S01E07:
Games Played: Daytime Talk Show, Song Styles, Moving People, Props, Party Quirks, Hoedown, and Foreign Film Dub
Fourth Seater: Greg Proops
Possible Theories: The Gone with the Wind-centric PQ quirk is eradicated before HBO MAX decides to put a disclaimer on the film. And I’ll once again guess that maybe they thought Foreign Film Dub would be too racist with the Egyptian language?
% Clean: 90%

S01E17
Games Played: Weird Newscasters, Scene to Rap, Moving People, Props, Greatest Hits, Party Quirks, and Hoedown
Fourth Seater: Stephen Colbert
Possible Theories: Like a later guest episode where the guest has some modicum of fame, perhaps Colbert’s agent nixed the release? That being said, his S8 episode is still up. It’s more likely due to Wayne playing Bill Cosby in Weird Newscasters, which OF COURSE hasn’t aged well. More references to Smurfs and Woody Woodpecker that may not allign with copyright.
% Clean: 70%

S02E11:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Film TV and Theatre Styles, Props, Party Quirks, Song Styles, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Greg
Possible Theories:  Colin’s LMAD quirk, especially his second round, maybe infuriated some people with taste? Drew does have a few dirty jokes after that game. Is I Love Lucy a brand they can’t touch?
% Clean: 80%

S02E14:
Games Played: Superheroes, Film TV and Theatre Styles, Props, Motown Group, The Millionaire Show, and Hoedown
Fourth Seater: Brad
Possible Theories: This has the first playing of Millionaire Show, and while the other subsequent playings aren’t all blocked from MAX, perhaps the likeness was too great here thanks to Brad’s Regis? Also, Suicide Boy as a name for Brad might also be a bit too tasteless, as well as Captain Bloodloss. F&TS involves killing, and eating innocent dogs. Ryan in Millionaire Show has multiple personalities, which isn’t a good look to be parodying in 2020.
% Clean: 55%

S02E23:
Games Played: Weird Newscasters, African Chant, Scenes From A Hat, Scene With An Audience Member, Dating Service Videos, and 90 Second Alphabet
Fourth Seater: Greg
Possible Theories: What about Drew saying Africa is a country is not airable now? Did Drew’s people nix it for defamation of character? Is it too toothless for black audiences? Greg’s ‘truck but not your girlfriend’ answer, “wow, you can fit four in there”, is probably one of the most vulgar variations of that suggestion. Maybe Ryan’s ‘laid’ Hats gag falls into this category as well, but that got censored.
% Clean: 80%

S02E30:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Film TV and Theatre Styles, Props, Newsflash, Greatest Hits, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Brad
Possible Theories: Going through this episode again, I’m having a hard time thinking of what’d be too much for streaming? Maybe Brad as a frisky dog in LMAD? Maybe ‘songs of the Psychiatrist’ is too taboo? I dunno, this one should really be on there. AS SHOULD ALL OF THESE.
% Clean: 100%

S03E09
Games Played: Hollywood Director, Duet, Party Quirks, Scenes From A Hat, and Props
Fourth Seater: Robin Williams
Possible Theories: It is most likely the case of Robin’s people being greedy and not wanting the episode out there for free, or even for subscription. Which absolutely blows. It could also be that Robin’s presence made this one of the dirtier WL episodes out there, with Director, PQ, SFAH and Props all having borderline unairable moments, thanks to Robin
% Clean: 40%, to be fair

S03E11
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Multiple Personalities, Hats, Props, Dead Bodies, Scene To Rap, and Stand Sit Bend
Fourth Seater: Greg
Possible Theories: Copyright issues with the Beavis and Butthead people? Other than that, this is a very clean show with no real unbroacastable issues.
% Clean: 100%

S03E15
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Whose Line, Props, Sound Effects (With Audience Members), Duet, and Hoedown
Fourth Seater: Jeff Davis
Possible Theories: Illegal use of the Klump family, and I Love Lucy again? Possibly Colin’s Moby Dick Hoedown verse, or most of Hoedown being badly mixed in general?
% Clean: 95%

S03E22
Games Played: Superheroes, Sound Effects (with audience members), Three-Headed Broadway Star, Whose Line, Irish Drinking Song, and Helping Hands
Fourth Seater: Chip Esten
Possible Theories: It’s most likely due to Irish Drinking Song, and the whole passed-stone saga. That’s the only part of this show that stands out to me as worthy of keeping this off streaming, but it’s the game this show is known for.
% Clean: 90%

S03E28:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Scene With An Audience Member, Props, Greatest Hits, and Foreign Film Dub
Fourth Seater: Kathy Greenwood
Possible Theories: My guess is it’s the iffiness of the Molly Scene with an Audience Member, as she looks either really high or just plain underage, and it may not have gone the greatest. It could also be Wayne’s ‘Invading Peru for the Hell of It’, which may have been too political…he says, scoffing, remembering the Muppets gun control song Wayne and Gary do in S17.
& Clean: 80%

S03E35:
Games Played: Hollywood Director, Infomercial, Action Replay, Greatest Hits, and Props
Fourth Seater: Kathy
Possible Theories: A few minor things in GH, like the rejected suggestion of Exotic Dancer, Wayne’s Michael Jackson reference, but not a hell of a lot in this one that warrants this.
% Clean: 90%

S03E39:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Two-Line Vocabulary, Greatest Hits, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Brad
Possible Theories: Ryan pissing into Brad’s water in LMAD? The grisly subject matter of Two-Line? A few jokes in GH, like the ‘SLOTS’ one, or the ‘4 days in the #1 position’ one? Most likely it’s ‘I Dropped My Chips in Your Nuts’, which AC/DC’s people must not have liked, and the later ‘Sportin’ Wood’ line in a hooker-related song.
% Clean: 75%

S04E07:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Title Sequence, Scenes From A Hat, Party Quirks, Three-Headed Broadway Star, and Hoedown
Fourth-Seater: Brad
Possible Theories: Perhaps the concept of cock-fighting in LMAD? More likely it’s Tyson and Lincoln, a one-joke scene at the expense of Evander Holyfield. That or the Gary Coleman jokes throughout SFAH. Or just the…ugliness of Ryan’s entire PQ quirk, which Brad dubs ‘the trailer for Deliverance’.
% Clean: 75%

S04E25
Games Played: Superheroes, Sound Effects (with audience members), Newsflash, Scenes From A Hat, and Hoedown
Fourth-Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: “Man, you don’t know how many butts I’ve had my dick up just to get this”. This is really the only line in the show that juts out to me, and it’s a big one. I’m saddened that something so small could derail this wonderful show hitting streaming, though.
% Clean: 90%

S04E26:
Games Played: Weird Newscasters, Hats, Greatest Hits, Film Dub, Show-Stopping Number, and World’s Worst
Fourth-Seater: Greg
Possible Theories: Both Greg and Ryan’s WN quirks push the envelope a bit. Greg has his big snap in Hats [“MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE OF THIS FUCKING MASK I’M WEARING”]. Also, maybe the ‘Priest or Rabbi’ World’s Worst also ruffled some feathers in standards
% Clean: 75%

S05E08:
Games Played: Scene to Music, Dubbing, Change Letter, Party Quirks, Irish Drinking Song, and Living Scenery
Fourth Seater: Brad [ft. Chyna]
Possible Theories: ‘possible’. This is one of the hardest-to-watch ABC shows, because Chyna makes every game she’s in needlessly sexual and ugly. Dubbing and Living Scenery are so cringeworthy. Even innocent-seeming games like Change Letter and IDS, missing a verse, are tainted.
% Clean: 35%

S05E10:
Games Played: Let’s Make a Date, Scene to Rap, Sound Effects (with audience members), Scenes from a Hat, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Greg
Possible Theories: Ryan’s skeevy LMAD quirk. Another psychiatrist-related game with WW.
% Clean: 90%

S05E15
Games Played: Questions Only, Weird Newscasters, Irish Drinking Song, Scenes from a Hat, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Kathy Griffin
Possible Theories. Of Kathy’s episodes, only one is on MAX/Seed, and it’s E2, where she’s not in a ton of it due to Miss America. This one she’s all over, she grabs and kisses Wayne in SFAH, has a very vulgar joke in WW, and lots in the ‘making love’ SFAH suggestion. That’s a big indicator, as is Irish Drinking Song, with the vulgar punchline everyone remembers and keeps echoing through the rest of the  show. OR…IT’S NEITHER, and the producers couldn’t get the rights to Boz Scaggs’ Lido Shuffle
% Clean: 60%

S05E19: 
Games Played: Newsflash, Song Styles, Two Line Vocabulary, Dubbing, and Three-Headed Broadway Star
Fourth Seater: Kathy Griffin, and David Hasselhoff
Possible Theories: Max’s continued dislike of Griffin, Hasselhoff’s dick joke at the end of Dubbing, and maybe Hoff’s people thought he didn’t come off too well after 3HBS. Also, a lot of Dubbing was pretty dirty, for the record. Still, I love this one and wish the masses could see it.
% Clean: 80%

S05E23
Games Played: Number of Words, Infomercial, Song Styles, Scenes from a Hat, Newsflash, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Kathy Greenwood
Possible Theories: Prince’s people didn’t like Song Styles, or it was too close to Let’s Go Crazy? Probably because of World’s Worst, and Drew’s tasteless bestiality joke therein.
% Clean: 85%

S05E25
Games Played: Superheroes, Duet, Scenes from a Hat, Living Scenery, and Themed Restaurant
Fourth Seater: Chip [ft. Neena and Veena]
Possible Theories: Chip running to Colin’s udder during Superheroes? It’s more likely the fear factor of Wayne and the snake, and the eventual obvious dick joke…and also the dirtier-than-usual nature of Living Scenery. Maybe even Wayne’s dog-eating joke in SFAH? Or…copyright issues with all the movies featured in Themed Restaurant.
% Clean: 70%

S05E29:
Games Played: Press Conference, Sound Effects (with audience members), Irish Drinking Song, Party Quirks, Helping Hands, and Themed Restaurant
Fourth Seater: Kathy Griffin
Possible Theories: Again, Kathy Griffin. Wayne sets Colin up to rhyme ‘rock-tucker’, and there’s only one connotation there. Colin’s repeated refrain of ‘NICE BOOBS’ in PQ.
% Clean: 80%

S06E06:
Games Played: Press Conference, Sound Effects (with audience members), Duet, Living Scenery, and Irish Drinking Song
Fourth Seater: Chip and some Cheerleaders
Possible Theories: Most of Living Scenery could raise some eyebrows, especially when Ryan’s lying down with all those cheerleaders [“SHUT UP, I’M ASLEEP”]. It may also be for IDS, which is bathroom humor that skirts the line of taste.
% Clean: 75%

S06E08:
Games Played: Film TV and Theatre Styles, Title Sequence, Action Replay, Greatest Hits, and 90 Second Alphabet
Fourth Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: Ryan’s ‘one bad mother’, even with censorship, in F&TS. Rights issues from Tom Jones or Duran Duran? It is most likely due to the GH subject, Songs of the Hitman, being a bit of taboo one.
% Clean: 80%

S07E08:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Film TV and Theatre Styles, Doo-Wop, Greatest Hits, and Props
Fourth Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: Out of the three from this taping, this one has the most games where Ryan looks miserable, with some audible coughs and him…dying basically in Doo-Wop. It may just be a solidarity thing. It could also be Props’ “careful, you were just about to step in that giant asshole”
% Clean: 95%

S07E09:
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Whose Line, Scenes From A Hat, Song Titles, Doo-Wop, and Props
Fourth Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: I may have found a pattern- Song Titles takes place in a psychiatrist’s office, so maybe the Seed/MAX people don’t like to make fun of psychiatrist’s offices or mental illness. It could also be Ryan’s LMAD quirk.
% Clean: 90%

S07E20
Games Played: Number of Words, Scenes From A Hat, Dubbing, Greatest Hits, and Props
Fourth Seater: Brad
Possible Theories: Rights issues for Number of Words and all the shows mentioned in GH, especially with what these characters are placed into [Spock kills himself, ‘get off of McCloud’]. It could have also been Colin’s ‘premature ejaculation’ joke in SFAH.
% Clean: 80%

S07E21
Games Played: Let’s Make A Date, Duet, Bartender, Party Quirks, Irish Drinking Song, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: I am 99% sure it was ‘Joe had a nice bone’ that prevented this one from being streamed. It could have also been Austin Powers rights issues, or Ryan’s hot-dog joke in PQ.
% Clean: 70%

S08E02:
Games Played: Weird Newscasters, Title Sequence, Scenes From A Hat, Greatest Hits, and Hoedown
Fourth Seater: Chip
Possible Theories: The absolute mess that was this central runner, and its eventual messy conclusion on Hoedown, probably made this one a no-go for release. The threat of Ryan’s unaired hoedown verse certainly didn’t help either.
% Clean: 85%

S08E03
Games Played: Questions Only, Sound Effects, Song Styles, Sportscasters, Props, Daytime Talk Show, Hoedown, and Stand Sit and Bend
Fourth Seaters: Brad and Patrick Bristow
Possible Theories: A number of lewd props suggestions? Possibly Brad’s pork fried rice joke in Hoedown, or Ryan’s priest joke?
% Clean: 95% Really, this one should have gone out.

S08E18
Games Played: Hollywood Director, Whose Line, Two-Line Vocabulary, Greatest Hits, and World’s Worst
Fourth Seater: Jeff
Possible Theories: I am very certain it’s Hollywood Director, which took long enough to make it to the states, that cost this one MAX privileges. Possibly also Ryan’s hairlip joke in GH.
% Clean: 80%

All of this is barred from MAX, and yet ‘200 pound snatch’, ‘Cosby and Hitler’, the Richard Simmons show, the Melissa incident and Wayne’s thong are all okay. I really don’t understand their censorship people at all.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: LAST DREW EPISODE S08E21, or It Smells Like Pants!

I started covering the Drew Carey era of Whose Line on July 13, 2019. I was thinking this would take me a year and a half. But on May 27th, 2020, less than 11 months later, I finish it up. Making this the quickest Watchdown I’ve done, quicker than the original UK version, which was much shorter. That is fantastic.

Of course, this watchdown isn’t technically finished, as there’s still a ton more WL to cover after this, but it’s the end of the era that made me fall in love with the show, got me into the fandom and everything. So that’s pretty huge. Drew Carey, say what you will about him in comparison to Clive or Aisha, made this show huge in America, and gave it the wide audience it had for years. That alone garners respect.

And so we finish out Drew’s run with an episode from the same taping as 1×20, which I declared the best show of Season 1. It’s also the last show for a while not to feature Wayne Brady, as Denny Siegel AND Greg Proops appear in this one. This is Denny’s last appearance on the show, and covering her on here certainly lead to a lot of interesting  points.

So…here we go, into 8×21. And as I ironically finish this show off the second it lands on HBO Max, that’s where I’m getting screencaps from for this episode.

Superheroes: No more shoelaces
Greg: Spineless Man
Ryan – Seductive Shower Boy
Colin – The Salmonella Kid
Denny – Bitchy Gossip Woman

The [sob] LAST EVER PLAYING OF THIS GAME.

Once the audience member yells out ‘SPINELESS MAN’, Ryan points him out directly to Greg. I assume after the show Greg blocked this person on Twitter.

Greg, to Drew, after ‘no more shoelaces’: “What trouble-free lives they lead…”

Greg has the physicality to pull off randomly falling to the ground without a spine

Greg’s announcement of the crisis is shockingly cut out of this.

Ryan and Greg do some great back-and-forth motions with Ryan giving Greg and handshake and trying to get him to stand straight

Ryan dubbing Colin ‘the Salmonella kid’ gets a very confused look from Colin. What’s he supposed to do with THAT?
Colin: [vomits]
OH, THAT!

Poor Denny, trying to get a line out with Colin vomiting and Ryan washing his ass in  front of the camera

Denny, to Greg: “DON’T TOUCH ME. I’m bloated and cranky, I need Haagen Daas.”
HA

Denny doesn’t have much of a solution, but she leaves Ryan with “you should be ashamed of yourself, I heard all about you with the shower head”

Ryan ends up with a solution anyway, getting a rope from ‘400 bars of ‘soap on a rope”, which makes up for Denny’s lack of one.

Ryan: “If i could just find that last piece of soap….OOOOHHHH”
GODDAMMIT, RYAN

Not a bad Superheroes. The motions in the middle cracked me up, between Colin and Ryan

Sound Effects: Colin is an American G.I. escaping from a German prisoner-of-war camp, Ryan does SFX

Last playing of this version of SFX.

I love the detail of Colin adding oil to the doors, and HIS SHOES, so  they won’t make a sound

Then, as Colin digs out, Ryan adds a ‘CHING’, and then a loud spurt. Yes, Colin randomly just struck oil. Colin has the silliest way out of it- he calls over the guard dog, then stuffs him in the hole to clog up the oil. DEAR LORD.

Colin hotwires a car, starts it, begins to drive off…and the engine stops. Colin sighs.

Ryan sounds a siren, and Colin runs around for a few seconds not knowing what to do. Ryan clarifies, and brings back the guard dog noises as well as a few ‘ACHTUNG’ in high pitches.

Colin ends up digging under and tries to find the next place to come up. Ryan, as Colin comes above ground, adds a Chinese murmur. THAT is a nice touch

A pretty good SFX. Lots of silly details.

Film, TV and Theater Styles: Greg is a jockey who walks into the stables to find Ryan, another jockey, injecting something into Greg’s horse

This game, which has been a staple of the show since E1 of the UK series, has its final Whose Line appearance, though it’d be worked into future Drew improv endeavors.

Also, YAY ANOTHER RYAN AND GREG SCENE

Ryan, on the eclectic group of styles: “so basically everything except Western”

Ryan immediately doesn’t like the ‘injecting something’ bit, so he instead inserts a sheep into the horse, which is…bizarre and silly

Love Story  style makes this even more suspect, with Ryan justifying that “that sheep and that horse are in love with each other”

The transition from Exorcist to Musical is great, because Ryan turns his shrieks of ‘HELP ME’ into the start of a fun musical number

The ‘puppet show’ style has Ryan doing some good jerky puppet movements

I love how, for First Aid Training film, Greg looks directly into camera 3 for a testimonial. It’s so well timed.

Then, as Greg explains this, Ryan…sticks his head in the cavity, shocking the audience.

A very bizarre F&TS, and though Ryan and Greg got tripped up in points, it wasn’t too bad.

Let’s Make a Date: Denny must choose from Greg, calling a horse race, Colin, passenger on a plane when the window blows open, and Ryan, desperate criminal on the run, cornered in the studio

Greg’s horse race announcer is FLAWLESS, and taps into his UK-era energy and fast-talking

Colin’s is all physical, and has some great anti-gravity acting, with a  yell for peanuts that reminded me of 5×21.

This shot is pretty great:
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 4.03.26 PM

Colin ends up getting his ass stuck in the window, which is a fun visual, but I love how Denny keeps trying to ask her question as he does this.
Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 4.05.26 PM
That is all it takes.

Denny, on Colin: “Is he getting sucked into the trunk of an elephant?”
Part of me is gonna miss Denny’s very wrong guesses

A pretty good LMAD.

Drew: “1000 points to Colin for…making Denny think he was being sucked into an elephant butt-first…”
WHEN  YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT…

Number of Words: Ryan is a G.I. stationed in Hawaii and Denny is his girlfriend, Greg is a beautiful, pregnant Hawaiian girl and Colin is Greg’s angry mother
Colin – 4 words
Greg – 2 words
Denny – 3 words
Ryan – 6 words

Yes, they played this one in S1. This is the last aired playing of this one, too

Somehow Colin has a funnier reaction  to Greg’s character than Greg does. Denny just feels his stomach for a baby.

Greg plays this Hawaiian like she’s Vietnamese for some reason

Ryan: “That baby’s mine? That can’t be?”
Colin: “YES YES YES YES.”

Denny: “Did you two…?”
Greg: “NO PROTECTION.”
SEVERAL AUDIENCE MEMBERS GASP

Ryan: “I guess I better marry you”
Colin: “…who, me or her?”
HA

Greg, crowning: “OHHHHHHHH SHIT.”
Okay then, have one last ride, censors

Greg: “NOT HIS.”
Colin: “Looks like Don Ho.”
Greg: “DREW CAREY.”
Drew: [BUZZ]

Well THAT WAS A MESS. Not tasteful or well put together, Denny didn’t have a part in it after halfway, the laughs came cheaply. Not great at all.

Moving People: Ryan is a store detective who spots Colin putting something in his coat pocket

Ryan: [attempts to remove ring]
Christina: [chuckles]

Ryan, pulling the thing out of Colin’s pocket: “IT SMELLS LIKE PANTS.”
Colin: “it’s the new…..prosthetic pant-piece…”

Colin, as Kyle keeps moving his arms: “Scuse, me, I’m just exercising for NO APPARENT REASON.”

I love the ending of Kyle and Christina hastily shoving Ryan  and Colin towards the other side of the stage, after each other

An alright Moving People.

Foreign Film Dub: Denny and Drew act out  the Italian film The Endless Day, dubbed by Greg and  Ryan

And this one has its last playing here too.

Greg: “All day long  I make the pasta and you  just stand there…like a big thing  that stands there..”

Denny holds Drew’s head close to her chest and says a line
Greg: ‘…come to my bosom and let me hold you.”
Drew: “…besame mucho, mama…”
Ryan: “YA DON’T HAVE TO ASK ME TWICE…”

A very light FFD. They all seemed to have fun with it, though.

Overall: We end S8 with another patented Season 8 mixed bag. Three games worked well, those being Superheroes, Sound Effects and LMAD. One game bombed, that being Number of Words. The rest were merely alright, with F&TS at least having some amusing moments. But compared to 1×20, this wasn’t much. It’s not a bad show, and a fine way of finishing S8, and the series, but it’s not the ideal.

Show Winner: Denny
Best Performer: Ryan beats Colin by a nose thanks to the final game of the night.
Worst Performer: Denny sadly foreshadowed her S2 self here.
Best Game: Sound Effects was a triumph. Very funny.
Worst Game: Number of Words. Just…not good at all.
Should This Have Aired in S1?: The first half should have..

SEASON 8 SUPERLATIVES:
Best Episode: E11, a shining moment in this season worthy of Season 1 enshrinement, a collection of Brad games, extended runs, bizarre ideas, and just great rounds like Daytime Talk Show and Questions Only. This is the natural extension of S10 of the Clive run, and I mean that as a compliment.
2nd Best Episode: E13, featuring Denny  perfectly playing off the men in Weird Newscasters, tomfoolery in Dead Bodies, Wayne knocking it out of the park even when singing about fish slices, and the last ever Narrate.
3rd Best Episode: E3, a long-awaited Patrick and Brad show that hit so well, with Patrick fitting right in with the action, great rounds of Questions Only, Props and Daytime Talk Show, and a game that almost made me enjoy Sportscasters.
Worst Episode: E12. One gigantic shrug from the editors, in lieu of material from a more worthy taping.
Episode Most Deserving of Another Look: E18. A lot of fun improv moments hiding  in here, and a lot of underrated games.
Most Necessary Inclusion: E3, the Patrick-Brad S1 episode that FINALLY made it to air 8 years later, and got the audience it deserved.
Least Necessary Inclusion: E12. Literally only Quick Change was worthy of air. Everything else was completely unnecessary.
Best Regular: Colin Mochrie, for having 8 show wins and dominating another season.
Best Fourth Seater: Greg Proops, for coming  off insanely well in  his shows, and notching 3 show wins along the way.
Best Guest Performer: Stephen Colbert, E9, for having a much better show than his original one.
Season That Came Off The Best: Season 1. I’m kinda glad they aired a lot of this season, as Season 1 is still a strange little bubble compared to the rest of the run.
Season That Came Off The Worst: Honestly, Season 5. Its one show was kind of a mess, and that’s all they wanted us to see.
Episodes Ranked: See my Twitter, @WLIIAWatchdown

Well…that was the Drew Carey era of Whose Line. It was big, bad, hysterical, and worthy of a several-years-long fandom. I’m glad I went through it. My opinions are mostly the same, but I learned a lot about Kathy Greenwood, about Brad’s strengths, about the way Drew’s desk jokes haven’t aged well, and about the evolution of the show’s improv output.

Now, logic would state that I would go right into US Season 9, the start of the CW run. However, I cannot do that. In doing this watchdown, part of my job is to tell the story of how this show evolved, how it accumulated personnel, and how it became what it is now. And I cannot do that without going into the short-lived projects that happened between the end of the ABC era and the beginning of the CW era. Because Drew Carey’s affiliation with improv doesn’t end when Whose Line ends on ABC Family. Oh no. It goes on for a bit.

Over the next few months, I will be covering the following, in order:
-Drew Carey’s Improv All Stars, a one-off pay-per-view special that aired in 2001, was the culmination of Drew’s Vegas collection of improvisers on a nightly basis, and foreshadowed the next ten years of non-Whose Line content.
-Drew Carey’s Green Screen Show, thirteen 2005-era episodes of a wise but misguided idea to have an improv show filmed on a green screen and have animators fill in the blanks. This show utilized different regulars, new pairings, and a brief emphasis on longer form improv that just teases what could have been.
-Drew Carey’s Improv a Ganza, 40 episodes aired in 2011 bringing forth performers from Improv All Stars [Drew, Jonathan, Sean, Kathy Kinney, Chip, Heather, Ryan, Greg, Jeff, Colin and Brad], getting them in a Vegas theater for a few weeks, and taping them. This show has become improv folklore to Whose Line fans, directly influences the CW era, and I am really excited to get to cover it.
-Trust Us With Your Life, eight episodes of a 2011-shot, 2012-aired, UK-filmed experiment in adapting Fast and Loose, Dan and Mark’s season-long British improv revue, to American audiences by piping in guest stars, an ill-fitting host, and a small, curious company of repertory players. I’ve said in the past I wouldn’t cover this one, but as a few games from it DIRECTLY influence Season 9 of the CW version, and since it features one shining  performance from a Whose Line legend, as well as a hosting stint from a legend who recently passed on, I kind of have to.

Then, after all of that is done, THEN…I will get to Aisha Tyler’s run of Whose Line. Because by that point, you’ll have all the context you need for why it worked.

I’m not sure if I’m gonna do anything immediately next to recap ABC Whose Line or get right into the Improv All-Stars special, but expect one of those soon.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E20, or We Got 10 Yards to Go and it’s Third Down

For the second-to-last ABC episode of the show, we go back  to the Brad taping that gave us 1×19, a really good episode with some famously dirty games. And of course, there’s more where that came from. This is also Brad’s last Whose Line until  2014, so make it count.

Let’s Make a Date: Brad must choose from Wayne, angry teen rebel from a 1950’s movie, Colin, store owner doing his own low budget commercial, and Ryan, raised by wolves

I love how Brad gives his usual high-pitched LMAD voice a bizarre pseudo-spanish accent.

Colin turns on the camera and then zooms into action: “I HAVE MORE SAUCE THAN I KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH. WHAT CAN I DOOOOO BUT MAKE SAUCE?”

Brad, after Colin’s: “someone needs Ritalin.”

Ryan brings back his crazy howling noises [from 1×14, mainly] here

Ryan then starts sucking Colin’s boob. Colin just includes this in the pitch: “YOU CAN’T FIND THIS  AT ANY OTHER STORE.”

Unfortunately, we’re limited to one round. Once Drew buzzes, Ryan just…keeps sucking.

Colin:
Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 10.26.14 PM
PFFFFF

Ryan pulls away, and just starts wiping away the small stain that’s now appeared on Colin’s shirt.

Brad: “and…Ryan was a werewolf that needed to nurse?”
FUNNIER THAN WHAT IT SAYS ON THE CARD

Drew: “100 points to Ryan for doing that to Colin, and 1000 points to Colin for letting him…”

Not a bad LMAD, but I would have loved another round.

Film, TV & Theater Styles: Ryan is angry at Colin because they have been forced to make an emergency landing of their light aircraft in Bigfoot territory

Ryan  and Colin start by restating  the description:
Colin: “Hope you’re not mad.”
Ryan: “Hey, this is  BIGFOOT TERRITORY.”

Soap Opera
Ryan, suddenly: “Gary, are ya worried about TRISH?”
Colin:
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 12.46.43 PM“….yes I am.”

The horror style is fun to see Colin’s shirt attack him
Ryan intervenes by shocking  the shirt with…something
Colin: ‘…WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?”
Ryan: “I DON’T KNOW.”

Drew: “football film”
Colin: [gives Drew a look]
Ryan: “…alright….”
Drew, after like 5 seconds of silence: [BUZZ]
Ryan: [smiles and shakes his head]
Get two Canadians to do football, why don’t you?

Western:
Colin: “Careful, the Sasquatch that killed my pa is out there…”

Ryan and Colin have some very tense Western dialogue, though Ryan nearly breaks at one point with a flubbed line
Ryan: “LOOK…we got ten  yards to go and it’s third down.”
OH MY GOD.
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 12.51.43 PM
That is a perfect  circle-back.

Not a perfect F&TS, but Ryan and Colin had a  ton of funny moments, and of course made a lot work.

Game Show: Brad hosts PICK THE CHEESE

Last WL playing of this one. Had a decent run.

Brad: “And Singh, since you are our returning champion, you get to kiss the other 2 contestants on the  lips before we start.”
Wayne does this in a way  that  isn’t too juicy or ridiculous, though Ryan’s just shaking his head that Brad came up with this

Brad has a funny conceit, waving a dead mouse in front of all 3 and making them guess which cheese they just had
Wayne: “That  would be the limburger out its butt”

Brad’s next round has him naming two ingredients and asking the rest to name the  cheese
Brad: “Olives and curry”
Ryan: “Jack Carter?”
OBSCURE REFERENCE OF THE  EPISODE FOR SURE

Brad: “paprika and almonds”
Colin: “Paprika and almond less cheese?”
Brad: “Be more specific”
Colin: ‘…cheese?”
HA

Brad: “Somewhere on my body…is a rare aged cheddar. [smirk] For 1000 points, someone has to find it…”
Brad is so diabolical in this game
BUT COLIN CALLS HIS BLUFF:
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 12.59.05 PMScreen Shot 2020-05-27 at 12.59.12 PM
JESUS, COLIN

Ryan, grabbing  something: “DOES CHEDDAR HAVE HOLES IN IT?”
Colin: “…nah, that’s swiss”
PFF

Brad, to Colin: “Ah, you  found it right there in the pocket marked ‘cheddar'”

A really good sendoff for this game. Brad was an excellent proctor, and had so many funny ways of doing  this concept. Also, it helps that ‘cheese’ is one of the many things Brad is instantly able to do funny things with, like ‘small animals’ and ‘primates’

Shopping from Home: Colin and Ryan sell three playing cards, A drawer with no bottom, and One shoe

THIS UK FAVORITE RETURNS FOR ONE LAST PLAYING

Colin, with the drawer: “A PICTURE FRAME. Or, if you have a longer wall, A LONGER PICTURE FRAME.”

Ryan and Colin, especially Ryan, are struggling  with these

Colin adds the three-cards to his ‘decorative thing’
Ryan: “How many uses ARE THERE for that?”
Colin: “We’re up to five, I think that’s pushin’ it..”
Colin’s honesty is selling this game

As the audience applauds a joke, Ryan turns to Colin and goes ‘do we have  a third thing?”
Colin: “Yes, I don’t know what it is”
Ryan: “I can’t remember either”
Drew: “…a shoe…”
Ryan: “OHHH…[shakes head, with NOTHING]
Colin, knowing this: “But there’s something bigger and better, and RYAN’S GONNA TELL US WHAT IT IS.”

Ryan: “You know I have large feet.”
Colin: “Oh…THE BIGGEST I’VE SEEN ON A HUMAN.”
Ryan stops his pitch to just give Colin a look for that one

Ryan asks Colin what he thinks it’d cost Ryan for shoes
Colin: “Oh, I don’t know, if it went by the inch…over 3000 dollars.”
Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-27 at 1.13.32 PM

So…they got into a lot of trouble this game, and they struggled throughout, but this was still very funny, and a lot of it was fun to watch. Again, if you’re looking at it at face value, you’re not gonna see much, but if you look past the improv and see both their internal struggles, it’s a lot funnier

Scenes from a Hat:

Last ever SFAH with Drew. Also, one of the first playings.

Drew: “A magazine that you’d never see at a newsstand”
Colin: “CAT BLENDER WEEKLY?”

Drew: “Ice Fishing Disasters”
Brad: “I GOT THE BARBECUE ALMOST FIRED UP.”

Colin does a gallows-humor suicide joke that I didn’t even love, but I love Drew responding with “what a dark little man you are…”

A bachelor’s refrigerator:
Brad: “You want some sour milk or some mustard.”
Colin: ‘…I’ll just have the girl.”
HA. Even Colin’s disturbed by that one

Not a great SFAH, to be honest. The other SFAH from 1×16, and even the unaired one from 1×06, was better.

Hoedown: Vending machines

ANNNND the last ever Hoedown with Drew, too.

Brad has a bizarre verse about being a human vending machine
“Give me your quarter, I’ll shoot some candy out my ass.”
SO THAT’S CENSORED…jeez…

Colin has nothing, so he does the second half of his verse in French. His old cop-out he hasn’t used since UK version.

Ryan’s, however, is classic:
“Singing a song about a vending machine
Don’t you know that  it’s really not my scene
Trying to think of something clever with a little twist
IF WE DO ANOTHER HOEDOWN I’LL SLIT MY FUCKING WRISTS.”
BOOM. Sadly  the joyful refrain is muted, but Colin just hangs his head down in embarrassment.

Not a great Hoedown, but Ryan’s verse is kinda worth it.

Overall: Okay show with a few bits that lifted it. Most of this show was either too short, too long, or unnecessary. Home Shopping was kind of a crapshoot that Ryan  and Colin got through on the strength of their partnership. All the other okay games barely even had that fun quality. Thank god for F&TS and Game Show, but there wasn’t much else to this one. Also, as it was very Colin-Ryan centric, Wayne barely factored into it.

Show Winner: N/A
Best Performer: Ryan had the biggest moments.
Worst Performer: Wayne was edited very badly here.
Best Game: Game Show was a success on several levels.
Worst Game: Scenes from a Hat was very stop-start.
Should It Have Aired in S1?: Not really, sadly. Honestly the best moments here ended up on the S1 DVD set.

COMING UP NEXT: The final ABC Family episode of Whose Line, and the last episode of the Drew Carey era. Also, the last Whose Line for a while to not feature Wayne Brady.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E19, or She’s Gonna Blow.

Around a year ago, I covered the very first episode of the show, and proclaimed it to be a very nice pick for a premiere episode. It had good game selection, fun moments, and Ryan as a foal being born. What more could you want?

Now, all these shows later, we go back to the taping that gave us that premiere, back to the prelim sessions of 1998 with Drew’s reddish dyed hair, and see if anything else happened at that taping that was worthy of release.

Questions Only: At a high school reunion

Colin and Greg start, rather than Greg and Wayne, which eliminates the chance of a Colin-Wayne scene

Ryan, entering: “remember me?”
Colin: “Aren’t you Shorty McFarlane?”
HA
Ryan, taking the gift: “Notice any  CHANGE?”
Colin: [giggles]
BUZZ

Wayne comes in as a Southern Belle type
Ryan: “…why can’t I help but think of Gone with the Wind?”
Wayne: “CAN YOU BELIEVE IT’S [collapses into gibberish]
BUZZ

Greg: “Do you have a room booked here at the hotel?”
Colin: “How big a room?”
That’s a nice line. How is THAT the first question? What would Colin want to get out of that?
Greg: “How lonely are you?”

Ryan comes in as a cop: “Can you stick your hands out please?”
Colin: “like this?”
Ryan, impressed: “…WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT?”

Ryan: “Would you like me to frisk you now?”
Colin, excited: ‘Could you?”
Ryan: “I’m not…ohhh Jesus”
BUZZZZZ

A good QO. It lost a bit for me in the middle, but had a solid progression and fun characters.

Film, TV & Theater Styles: Ryan is a volcano expert and he’s talking to the skeptical mayor, Greg, on the lip of a dormant volcano after it’s beginning to show signs of life

This game, with Ryan and Greg instead of Ryan and Colin, may be the last gasp of the UK era trying to speak up.

Audience member: “Striptease”
Drew: “No, that’s not a…” [THINKS ABOUT  IT]
Ryan, sees where he’s going: “yeah, great…”
Greg: “you gotta pay for that channel…”
Drew: “Just cause they don’t wanna do it, we’ll see if we can  work it in…”
That is a Clive move right there

Drew: “You’re gonna start out as normal…”
Greg: [cackles]

The intro to this game is classic.
Ryan, contemplative: “…she’s gonna blow.”
Ryan begins the next line…but the audience gets ahead of him, and he swallows it. The audience knows exactly where this is gonna go, just like ‘buffalo come’
Greg, finally: “Never mind  HER, what about this gigantic hole here…”
THEEERE WE GO. Greg and Ryan crack at that

Kung Fu:
Ryan, wild facial expressions: “CAN’T YOU SEE…THE EARTH IS ANGRY AT YOU.”
Greg, after some flapping: “……..BALDERDASH.”

Horror movie:
Ryan: “You’re right, your mole is the exact replica of the volcano…”
Greg, Peter Lorre: “I’ve been wondering when you would notice that..”

Ryan and Greg do some GREAT ACTING in this style, with Ryan going “I MEANT TO USE THAT MOLE FOR GOOD, NOT EVIL.”

Kabuki style is good for Greg’s physicality. Ryan has a great gag with saying something in Japanese, then translating it as the exact same thing he just said

Greg: “Can’t you see that I love you near this enormous eruption?”
HA

Drew: “For the heck of it, Striptease.”
Greg: “well, since the earth’s gonna reveal itself.”
YES

A really strong F&TS, with some great Greg-Ryan stuff. This felt like a mid-UK-version scene, and in all the best ways.

Song Styles: Wayne sings to Sarah, the teacher, as James Brown

Once again, with this impression Wayne has the energy  and moves down.

Heck, Wayne even throws in some banter with one of Brown’s band members. Sarah’s loving all of  this.

Wayne  does a split….and needs Sarah’s help to get out of it.

A fun Song Styles, but not as good as the other recent James Brown one Wayne did

Props:  Ryan and Colin vs. Greg and Wayne

POOL TOYS. LITERAL POOL TOYS. That’s how we end this game’s run on ABC. WITH POOL TOYS.

Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.43.01 PMRyan: “You ordered the Human Picnic Table?”

Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.44.38 PMColin: “Well, Mr. Johnson, I warned you about Viagra’s side effects…”
Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.45.37 PM
Greg: “Well, Mr. Brady, I warned you about Viagra’s side effects”
YES

An  alright Props. Some good moments, lots of sameness.

Game Show: Greg hosts Who’s Your Daddy?

A game we haven’t seen since the UK series went to LA.

Drew’s about to go with Guess This Fish when some renegade guy bellows ‘WHOOOO’S YOUR DADDY?’. Wayne and Ryan love this one, so Drew changes his mind

Also, as Drew passes off to Greg, he calls him ‘Brad’, and nobody calls him out on it
Drew, a second later: “OH! GREG. Sorry.”
Drew, to camera: “thanks for the update on the cards…”

Greg: “Thank you, Mariah”
OF COURSE

Colin: “I’m Lassie Macintosh, I’m a canine stunt-person.”
Only Colin

Greg asks which historical figure had 16 children
Colin: “Joan Crawford”

Greg asks who Alexander the Great’s kid was
Colin: “Alexander the Mediocre?”

The last stage is Greg putting one person on the spot to do an interpretive dance, and he chooses Wayne, even though Colin would be funnier

An alright Quiz Show. Not as good as some UK playings.

Hats: Dating Service Videos

Dispatches from 1×01’s solid Hats

Drew: “I think you have…”
Ryan: “The one with ‘Ryan and Colin’ on top?”

Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.55.32 PMColin: “I don’t really have anything to say, but…don’t I look cute?”
HA

Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.56.27 PMGreg: “DID SOMEBODY SAY MCDONALDS?”
Who would get a MacTonite reference in 2007? I certainly wouldn’t.

Screen Shot 2020-05-26 at 7.57.36 PMRyan: “How ’bout taking a trip around Uranus?”

Not as good as 1×01’s Hats

Scene to Rap: Laundromat

LORD ALMIGHTY WE’VE FINALLY MADE IT TO THE LAST PLAYING OF THIS INFERNAL, CONSARNED GAME???? PRAISE THE GODS.

Ryan  gives up on his verse, and jumbles out ‘my  bellybutton’s full of lint’ barely in time
Ryan, shrugging: “I’m a white guy.”

Colin has a pun with “can’t you  see, my TIDE has turned”. THREE WOMEN AUDIBLY GROAN.

Not a great one. Thank god I’m done with this goddamned game.

Overall: Strong start, mellowed out over its second half, but I don’t have many qualms with this show. I’m glad that Questions and F&TS got to air, as well as Song Styles, but the rest was very indicative of S1 trends, leftovers from 1×01 playings, and a lot of very meh stuff.  However, nothing here really pissed me off, aside from Scene to Rap, and this is still generally just a fine show.

Show Winner: N/A
Best Performer: Greg sneaks away from Colin
Worst Performer: Ryan made slightly more mistakes tonight
Best Game: Film & Theater Styles really impressed me.
Worst Game: Scene to Rap. Unsurprisingly.
Should This Have Aired in S1?: Uh…not entirely.

Coming  Up Next: Our penultimate episode of the show takes us to a Brad Sherwood taping that ALREADY gave us a killer, dirty as hell S1 show.

 

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E18, or Kimosaaabe…

For the last glimpse of Season 4, or really  anything that isn’t Season 1-related, we go to the very end of  the Season 4 sessions and look at a Jeff Davis taping we’ve seen two alright shows from, but this one felt very needed considering the amount of unaired stuff [this report was out there for a bit]. This is Jeff’s last episode of the Drew era, but…rest assured, we’ll be seeing a lot of him for the rest of this watchdown.

A fun fact: every game of this episode is played for the last time with Drew tonight. All of these games don’t show up in the last 3.

Hollywood Director: Wayne is a gangster boss who has been shot and staggers into the emergency room, where he forces surgeon Ryan to extract the bullets, Jeff is a mob hitman who bursts in, gun in hand, determined to finish him off

This has an appearance from Wayne’s ultra-good mobster voice.

Ryan, as Wayne cries in pain: “D’ya have an HMO.”
Eerily prescient

Wayne, being Wayne, has been shot in the ass.
Ryan: “That’s bad, I’m going to have to suck  that out.”
OF COURSE

This show we also learn  that JEFF also has a GREAT gangster movie voice.

Jeff: “I work for the HMO, and I want you dead so I don’t have to pay for your service and your coverage.”
Ryan: ‘…pardon?”
Jeff: [smacking Ryan repeatedly] “that’ll be 200 dollars please!”
I cannot wait for him to dominate the CW version.

Headlining Vegas Performers:
Wayne: “Hello, folks, I just got shot in my butt, THANK YOOOOU…”

Ryan, magician voice: “I WILL NOW ATTEMPT TO SUCK THE BULLETS..FROM HIS BUTT.”
They are nailing this.

Jeff: “HOLD EVERYTHING, MY NAME IS SIEGFRIED AND GET READY TO SEE SOME ILLUSION.”
Thank god he picked the one that’s still alive 19 years later.

Swedish Porn Movie:
Ryan: [sews seductively]
Angela, I see your point…

Wayne, removing his pants: “Maybe you can HELLLP MEE…”

Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.24.50 PM
This is perfect
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.25.32 PM Dear god…

Wayne, after Ryan is finished, shoots himself again in the butt: “I’VE GOT ANOTHER ONE..”

A really good Director. Colin was barely even needed, the other 3 worked that scene without him. So many funny bits.

Whose Line: Holed up in a shack surrounded by outlaws, Lone Ranger Colin and Ryan, Tonto, try to work out a plan

Ryan: “…you have plan?”
Colin: “No.”
Ryan: “oh…”
Sometimes that’s all it needs

Ryan: “Among the tribe, among the Cherokee, we have a saying- it is ‘kiss me, baby, you look great…”
I like the little struggle after this [“WE WORK WITH EACH OTHER 20 YEARS KIMOSABE, YOU  WON’T KISS ME?”]

Colin: “Maybe once we get out of here……oh, who am I kidding-”
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.29.56 PM
Colin just trusting his instincts there.

Ryan, afterwards:
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.32.54 PM
He did not think he’d get Colin to do that..

Colin: “Now that we’ve found this love, we now have a reason  to get out of here.”
Ryan: “…Silver better.”
awww..

Ryan, putting his head to the floor: “…me listen  to neighbors downstairs.”
HA
Colin: ‘Anything?”
Ryan, shaking his head: “nothing.”
Colin, sort of peeking out of character: “nice try, though..”

Ryan, after a line, rationalizes that “my people eat yellow snow, Kimosabe”
Colin: “Why’s that?”
Ryan, already tired: “ohhh…long story..”

Colin gets a plan for Ryan to come out shooting.
Ryan, getting mixed up: “If run out of gun, I throw gun…IF RUN OUT OF BULLET. If run out of GUN, I throw HORSE.”
HA

Colin, noticing where Ryan’s voice has gone: “Why don’t you strip down to your  underwear, pretend you’re Tarzan.”
Ryan: “…KIMOSABE…”
I frigging love that read. Colin’s about to say his line, he cracks, and goes “you know, I liked it when you  said it like that.”
Ryan’s also giggling.

Colin’s battle cry: “WHY DO MEN HAVE NIPPLES?”
He looks around, curiously.
Ryan, from behind him, same read: “KIMOSAAAAABE….”
PFFFF. Jeff loses it now.

REALLY GOOD WHOSE LINE. Ryan and Colin had so much fun with it. So many great moments and lines. When the kiss isn’t the best moment, you know they’re doing well.

Two-Line Vocabulary: Colin is the mastermind behind Jurassic Park, and he’s briefing his park workers, Ryan and Wayne, because the dinosaurs have escaped and have gone on a rampage
Wayne’s lines: “what do you want me to do?” and “that’s not my thing”
Ryan’s lines: “what’s that” and “are you mad”

Last EVER playing of this one.

Wayne, with a Southern accent: “What d’you want me to do?”
Colin: “I want you to help me.”
Wayne: “oh, that’s not my thing..”

Wayne, after Colin explains some things: “What d’you want me to do.”
Colin has some great eye and brow movements: “…WHAT I JUST SAID…IS WHAT I WANT YOU TO DO?”
Ryan: “What’s that?”
Colin has  another confused lapse here.

I also love that after Colin explains this again, Ryan does a quieter, concerned ‘are you mad?’, and Colin matching that tone with a similar ‘I’m not mad!’

Colin does a finger  move as he rants to Ryan
Ryan, copying this finger move: “What’s that?”
HA

As Wayne works Colin up, Ryan again asks “are you mad”
Colin:
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.47.35 PM
He just holds that for a few seconds. He is SO GOOD at  slowburn anger.

After Ryan doesn’t know what a tranquilizer is, Ryan: “ARE YOU MAD?”
Colin begins strangling Ryan: “YES, I’M MAD AT YOU!”
YES. Only way this COULD end, really.

Pretty good Two-Line, though not as good as some of the others I’ve seen.

Greatest Hits: Songs of Norway v2

Ryan, after an iffy ‘Norway/no way’ pun: “If I could hear you people at home, I bet there’s reluctant applause..”

This is a debut for Jeff’s Johnny Cash impression, and it wins over the audience almost immediately

Jeff: “All the people, they stopped and laughed, they  said ‘hey, you look like a stupid giraffe”
He realizes how silly that sounds:
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 6.55.22 PM

The Johnny Cash number is a pretty fun one, and Wayne and Jeff have  good harmony  on it

Jeff and Wayne’s Temptations number, with shifting tempos, is pretty good too. Once they’re at the faster tempos, they’re really killing it, doing great fast-singing and staying on top of it.

Ryan: “Hey SOL-Col…”
They both break a little at that
Ryan: “I called you by your Jewish name, I’m sorry…”
Colin, straight-faced: “Shalom.”
PFF
Ryan has to stop for a second as well

Ryan: “What sound does a crow make?”
Colin: “CAW.”
Ryan: “…how about a hairlip crow”
Colin: ‘….CAAUUUGHHH”
Ryan: “SKA.”
I loved Colin’s answer
And Colin just shakes his head when he realizes THAT’s Ryan’s segue
Ryan, smirking: “long way to go!”

Jeff and Wayne’s Ska number is also pretty damn good. It helps that they’re great at working off each other in this game, which is why I’m excited to see them do more in the CW version.

Pretty good GH, but nothing TOO special.

World’s Worst: Person to be a member of the armed forces

Colin: [pops grenade, throws pin….rolls eyes]

Colin, doing a chant: “WHAT’S THE COLOR OF YOUR POO…”
A reference to 5×26’s SFAH, I see..

Not a great World’s Worst.

Overall: Good enough show, with some really good well-improvised moments, and some good scene games like Whose Line and Two-Line making the core of this show really strong. Yes, the second half fell off a bit, as much as I enjoyed GH, but this was still a needed show, and a good picture of a solid Jeff taping, perhaps one of the reasons why Drew would include him in other projects.

Show Winner: Jeff
Best Performer: Wayne wins it in a very close match thanks to some World’s Worst energy, and just for impressing me a lot this show.
Worst Performer: …I don’t wanna put anyone here. This category implies someone made improv mistakes. Nobody really did that this show.
Best Game: I wanna give it to Director…but Whose Line was just that good.
Worst Game: World’s Worst was a strong miss.
Should This Have Aired in S4?: Yes, definitely. Not a high-tier one from this taping, but still pretty good.

Coming Up Next: We’re back to  S1 for the remaining three, and we return to a Greg taping that gave us the VERY FIRST EPISODE OF THE SHOW.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E17, or Look at the Little British Man Cry

After sixteen episodes over 2006, ABC Family stopped producing new episodes of Whose Line. After 8×16, it was presumed to be the end of the road for the beloved show.

And then suddenly it wasn’t.

From overseas, reports came of five ‘lost’ episodes going into circulation, airing in markets like Australia and such, that counted as Season 8 material. Some of it was, like most of S8, Season 1 stuff, but there were a few exceptions. And as clips from these episodes hit Youtube [thanks again, Spence], one of those exceptions, which was incidentally the first to hit ABC Family, was a Season 3 taping.

In December 2007, a year after the last S8 episode aired, these episodes started airing on ABC Family. I was already a fan by this point, and I watched these episodes as the clips came on youtube. Even from the first one, I knew that we were privileged to be getting these at all.

And that’s where we are. A Kathy Greenwood taping from Season 3, notably giving us 3×38 with Ryan’s fateful neon light accident, and some other lesser shows. And now we’re seeing its last gasp, as well as the last aired episode from Kathy Greenwood on Whose Line. I’ve spoken at length about her legacy, about how neither the fans nor the editors seem to give her any modicum of respect. I hope after reading all these you feel a little better about Kathy’s place in Whose Line history.

For the record, the desk is lit when Drew comes down.

Let’s Make a Date: Kathy must choose from Wayne, Rocky training for a fight, Colin, Shapeshifting Terminator who becomes an evil version of whoever he touches, and Ryan, Turning into a protective mother penguin catching food for her young

Wayne’s Stallone isn’t bad. It’s not GREAT, but  he  gets some parts right
Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 5.35.17 PM

Colin absorbs Wayne, leading to his marginally-better Stallone, and goofier motions

Ryan waddles over to Drew and starts drinking  from his mug. I dunno, the second he goes over to that desk, I get worried, both  for the safety of Ryan AND the desk..

We don’t get an official 2nd round, we just cut to Colin absorbing Ryan  and murdering Wayne

I love the bit where Ryan and Colin  start nuzzling each other and feeing each other. Very silly.

An okay LMAD.

Drew: “I’d like another soda please…since Ryan stuck his NOSE in mine…”

Whose Line: Peter Pan, Ryan, has flown into Wendy’s, Colin,  bedroom for the first time to ask her for her help in NeverNeverLand

Drew: “Ryan is Peter Pan, and Colin is…”
Colin, knowing this show: “…WENDY?”
Drew: “Colin knows just what we think of him ’round here…”

Colin’s initial british accent [‘sorry peetuh’] cracks up Wayne instantly

Ryan: “I got a message from you earlier that said ‘Dear Peter…”say hello to Little Elvis”

Colin, sighing and going with his gut: “…little Elvis visits me once a month.”
WOW

Colin: “Mother explained the facts of life to me, did you know…’here’s a trick I picked up in the Navy”

Ryan: “When they ask ‘why didn’t Wendy come with you’, I’m gonna look at them and I’m gonna say  ‘You don’t sweat much for a fat girl.”
OH MAN.
Colin: “I AM JUST RETAINING WATER, THAT IS ALL.”
Ryan: “Is it because of Little Elvis.”
Colin has a little head-shake here, remembering that he did that bit, and not being too pleased with it.

Colin has some good details that save this for me, like pointed out that the last time they flew, she forgot fairy dust ‘and I plummeted’, and then stopping Ryan from flying by remembering how they set up the room, going ‘THAT’S THE WALL’, and turning him around.

I also love Ryan, who built the ending around Colin’s 2nd line, going, smirkingly, “I HOPE IT’S GOOD.”

Colin’s final rebel yell: “SPANK ME HARD AND CALL ME REGIS.”

Not the best WL scene, but Colin helped lift it towards the end.

Props: Ryan and Kathy vs. Colin and Wayne

Some of the ones so far are ideas we’ve seen before, but presented in a fun way. Ryan and Kathy are having a really good time thinking up theirs together.

Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 5.51.53 PMWayne: “WEEEEEE….REPRESENT…”
Colin, gruff voice: “THHEEE LOLLY…”
Wayne: [gives him a look]
Colin, gruff voice: “I’VE BEEN TAKING HORMONES.”
Wayne: [scurries away]
I kinda love that one

Screen Shot 2020-05-25 at 5.53.13 PMRyan: “I’M EXTINCT?”
HA

For the ‘banjo playing’ one, Wayne brings back his ‘ugly hillbilly’ face from 3×38’s Weird Newscasters

Wayne, with the props as a wheelchair: “I’M IRONSIDE.”
Colin: “…….I’M MARK.”

A fun Props, just from the mood they all seemed to be in.

Ryan teases Drew with the prop before finally throwing it to him. Again, goofy  mood. This must have been pre-light-breakage

Greatest Hits: Songs of James Bond v2

Colin sets up an early 50s rock song
Ryan, as usual: “I wasn’t here like you, but I’ve heard about it…”

Wayne’s Chuck Berry song is pretty basic, but he has some good flair to it.

Colin has a setup for a long winded story about roadie-ing, but as Ryan checks his watch, Colin goes “ah screw it” and cuts it short

Wayne’s Aerosmith number is pretty basic too, honestly

Colin talks about dating a lot of female rockstars, “like Sheena Easton, and…oh, Boy George, but that was a misunderstanding..”

It’s actually funny that they have Tina Turner on this one, as she did a GREAT Bond theme in Goldeneye.

Wayne’s Tina Turner number is his best one, as he has the voice, energy, and some really funny Bond-villain lyrics going on [“look at the little british man cry”]

A weaker GH, but not completely without merit.

Foreign Film Dub: Drew and Kathy act out the Hebrew film Meshugganah!; Ryan and Colin dub

If only Mira were here

From Drew’s opening line, which is just a lot of phlegm, it seems he’s mistaken Hebrew and Klingon.
Ryan: “I’m a little stuffed up.”
Kathy: [confused fake hebrew]
Colin: “For a second I thought you were phlegm-ish”
HAAAAAAA

Both Drew and Kathy are shrugging through their layman’s knowledge of hebrew jibberish. Kathy even goes into Polish, and cracks up when she realizes

Drew: “UHHHH…[chuckles]…OY VEY.”
They are REALLY REACHING.
Ryan: “oh, I blew out the  candles without  making a wish!”

Kathy goes into almost a prayer recitation, sing-song, with extra phlegm on the end
Colin: “…why do birds suddenly appear…”
This cracks up Drew and Kathy

Kathy: [does another phlegm-filled line]
Colin: “…as my Scottish mother used to say…”
HA. Oh good lord, at least they’re having fun with this

Drew, absolutely out of fake-Hebrew: “…VELL, I GUESS DAT’S IT DEN.”
Ryan, without options, does his line in fake Hebrew. THAT is a fun idea I’ve always loved.

Okay, not a GREAT round, but this was very  funny, and I love that the patheticness of the fake Hebrew factored into the scene in general.

Overall: Very okay. Nothing truly bombed, but nothing truly succeeded, either. At least games like Props, Whose Line and Foreign Film Dub were amusing in  how much fun the performers were having despite the quality not being up. A weak sendoff for Kathy, though she did well in the small roles she was given.

Show Winner: Wayne
Best Performer: Colin pulled away in FFD. Wayne was very close.
Worst Performer: Kathy came up short for me.
Best Game: Foreign Film Dub got the most laughs out of me.
Worst Game: Greatest Hits disappointed me the most.
Should This Have Aired in S3?: Not really, no.

COMING UP NEXT: One more Season 4 taping, if you can believe it. There a bit more from Jeff Davis’ second taping of those sessions. Thankfully, I don’t have to say goodbye to Jeff for very long after this one.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E16, or Keep Those Letters Coming In

For a little while, this was considered the last ever episode of Whose Line. We’ll get to why it wasn’t next show, but this was initially the note the show went out on. And knowing the show this Greg taping gave us before, the okay 1×11, it’s a weird choice, and I can see why they went for more after this.

Superheroes: No beer
Greg: Superbum

Ryan – Rodeo Boy
Colin – Captain Nosy
Wayne – Captain Totally Made of Springs

Greg: “I just wanna thank you for not picking Proctology Man”

Greg: “By day, I’m billionaire, but by night, [indecipherable babbling]”

Greg: “I USED TO  RULE THIS PLANET WHEN IT WAS UNDERWATER”
[The other 4 giggle at that one]

Ryan’s rodeo-riding motions are very goofy, as are his little ‘yeehaw’ noises. Reminds me a little of his ‘come to ride Tony’s camel’ party quirk from the UK.

As Colin starts being nosy and wanting to know what’s going on [coming off like a cross between Fred Armisen and Mark Proksch], Ryan interrupts by knocking Colin down and branding him

Wayne has a very easy selection of ‘go buy some’ is one of the reasons why I won’t miss Wayne playing this game.

Colin: “I’ve gotta go find out why Carrot Top is still working!”
HA

A pretty good Superheroes. Lots of working off each other.

Sound Effects: Colin is a monk that escapes from his monastery for a night on the town

This scene description absolutely baffles Colin
Colin, sighing: “…keep those letters coming in…”

I love Colin frantically pulling on clothes, taking a while to pull his pants up, then struggling with the zipper.
Ryan: “AIGH! AIGH! AIGH!”
Colin: [unzips]
THAT is funny. That had me laughing

Colin goes to start up his car, then eventually Ryan makes it clear that his ‘car’ is actually a goat. Colin has to muffle the goat to make a clean getaway. So silly.

I love the music sounding once Colin  enters, and just bobbing his head in time with it. I love how Colin immediately  seems awkward in this situation, and how good he is at this type of character

Colin  ends up doing some amazing disco dancing, some praying motions on the dance floor.

Colin has something catch his eye
Ryan: [goat noise]
Colin sighs, and has the goat under his arm the whole time, then goes to the door and chucks the goat out  the window.
Ryan: “MAAAAaaaaaa…”
pffffff

Unfortunately we end there, but I loved this SFX so much it doesn’t deter me too much.

Props: Ryan and  Colin vs. Greg and Wayne

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 6.25.19 PM
Greg: “Congratulations, Mrs. Johnson!”
Audience: [groans]

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 6.25.25 PMColin: “So you fell down the cave  and THEN WHAT HAPPENED?”
HA

Wayne does a wishbone gag that actually ends up tearing the prop a bit.

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 6.32.19 PMRyan: “DIE ALASKAN VAMPIRE, DIE!”
This is a great one!

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 6.33.22 PMColin: “Look, it’s the world famous Viagra Falls!”
Ryan just shakes his head

Colin does a stilts gag that the audience doesn’t get, so he literally has to yell out “I’M ON *STILTS*”

A very fun Props.

Hey You Down There: Greg narrates as Ryan and Colin prepare for a nuclear attack

Sadly this is the last ever playing of this one

Greg: “Well, autumn’s here. And your thoughts turn to one thing- NUCLEAR ANNIHILATION.”
Greg is the best at this game

Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 7.30.52 PMPFF

Greg introduces the pair’s checklist as Ryan does a churning motion
Greg, not following: “you’ve got your…thing that goes up and down…”

I like Colin and Ryan going through all the intricate locks they have on the shelter

Greg: “Watch out for the last switch, that’s a doozy”
Colin: [flips it no problem]

Greg: “After all, animals can get hurt by a nuclear rain as well. You wouldn’t want Flappy’s ears falling off…”

Ryan does a fart gag, but Colin actually gives it a nice payoff in having it kill the cat, and him having to give CPR.

Colin and Ryan get in an argument over Twister
Greg: “Remember, no fighting. That’s how this all got started to begin with…”
HA

A really  good HYDT to wrap this game up on here. Honestly one of my favorites.

Daytime Talk Show: Hey Diddle Diddle. Greg hosts, Ryan and Colin are guests, Wayne’s in the audience

Sadly, this is the last ever playing of this one as well

Greg, unwittingly picking up from E14- “CUTLERY, when it leaves, it leaves an emotional scar…”

I love Colin’s twitchy, eyes-darting performance

Ryan: “My  eye is to a high-powered telescope 24-hours a day, I’ve never…EVER…seen a cow jump over the moon. YES, I’ve seen  a walrus get MIGHTY CLOSE TO URANUS, but…”
HA. That is a great  line.

Wayne comes in with an Indian accent, second show in a row for those, and he  at least has a good point about people launching sacred animals to his culture over the moon.

Colin, purposely missing: “I am sick and tired of the  SWISS COMING IN HERE, TELLING ME HOW TO RUN MY COWS.”

Wayne has another great performance as the mother of the little boy who laughed. Just shaming them for thinking they know him.

Ryan, chuckling to Colin: “Talk about COWS…”
Wayne: [darts towards the stage]

A very fun DTS to wrap this one up. Not quite to the heights of other ones this season, but Wayne’s performances made this one worthy.

Scene to Rap: High school

Sadly, this is NOT the last ever playing of this  one, but we’re getting close.

Also, this is another game that was featured in the DVD bloopers

Greg and Wayne are goofing around at the top. Greg sticks his ass towards Wayne, who has his hands on it for a moment before innocently backing away

Gee, I WONDER WHY A ‘CRIME AT A SCHOOL’ GAME DIDN’T AIR IN 1999….

The initial conflict is also dicey, with Greg as the principal calling Wayne out for trying to bring a bazooka into a school.

Greg eventually: “I’m the principal, and that’s true,
and…I’m…just fucking this up, man…”
Greg and Wayne just hug, and Greg just mutters something like ‘I’m sorry, I just gotta do it again, man…”

Linda stops the track, Greg bows for the audience, and then  the track restarts and they get back into it. Greg has  to take a moment, because he’s still cracking up, but he’s pretty  back

Wayne  rewrites the scene to be a little safer, where Wayne’s a grade A student who’s always on time, and Greg’s just giving him an A. Where’s the conflict in that? How is that a good scene?

Greg screws up a rhyme with ending with ‘on your book’, which Wayne calls him out on.
Greg: “I’m your teacher, I don’t have to rhyme”

Ryan, timidly entering: “i’m in Grade 5 and I’m 30 years old…’

Wayne has another weird move, now HITTING on this new 30 year old female student.
Wayne: “I’ll be your guy, I’ll show you round the  school
Show you to shop class, and show you my tool.”
WAYNE. BEHAVE.

Colin has a good ending, coming in as the gym teacher and getting everybody to work out.
Ryan, eventually: “I’ll phone my wife, she’ll make us lunch!”
Wayne, confused: “I thought you were a girl!”
Ryan: [‘dammit’]

A decent scene, even with everything. Wayne took it to some pretty odd places, but it still ended up kinda wholesome and pretty fun.

Hats: Dating Service Videos

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 7.55.39 PMColin: “This is not the only rubber thing I’m wearing..”

Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 7.56.28 PMGreg: “Well, I’m a Klingon by trade…”
Audience: […]
Greg: “…but when  I’m NOT funny, I sit here with this fuckin’ thing on my  head…”

Kind of a weak Props.

Overall: Pretty good show. Lots of solid games populating the whole thing, a few solid farewell playings, a good blooper playing that still kinda worked [Scene to Rap], and really only one game that  didn’t work. Superheroes, Daytime Talk Show and Hey You Down There carried the load, Props and Sound Effects were amusing specific games, and Scene to Rap worked in spite of chaos. It  also helped that Greg was in a good mood tonight, and lifted games throughout.

Show Winner: N/A
Best Performer: Greg pulls away  from Colin late, even with the Scene to Rap snafu
Worst Performer: I can’t forgive Wayne for his rewriting  the scene in Scene to Rap, sadly, despite a great performance in  Daytime Talk Show.
Best Game: Sound Effects I really, REALLY liked.
Worst Game: Hats just thudded off.
Should It Have Aired in S1?:  Yeah, it’d have fit right in.

COMING UP NEXT: In another universe, this may be the end of the ABC run of the show. But after a YEAR of radio silence…five final episodes aired on ABC Family. And the first of them gives us our final Kathy Greenwood episode.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E15, or Alligator Come.

Back in 8×03, we had a belated episode from a Brad Sherwood-Patrick Bristow taping that got shelved. Thank the gods ABC Family was nice enough to give us another one or else this would be completely useless as a season.

When I was covering S1, I made it a point to dub Brad ‘the bad boy of Whose Line’, and most of this taping built that legacy. As Drew sets up the show, Brad…is doing  this:
Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 4.42.33 PM
Patrick has to slap him to keep him alert.

On the bloopers, we know that the producers had to make Drew do the intro over again, which led to cries of ‘COME ON *BRAD*” throughout the rest of the taping. Drew even has to redo his LMAD intro that’s too dour, and Ryan blames Brad for THAT, too.

Let’s Make a Date: Patrick must choose from Brad, a Catty Vegas show girl, Colin, Hannibal Lecter, and Ryan, a boisterous drunk in a strip club

Patrick has another high, goofy voice for this [sounding like Erwin from Billy and Mandy if that makes any sense]: “what type of dessert are you?
Brad: “I’m a dessert you are not going to get to eat, LET ME TELL YOU  RIGHT NOW…”

I like the reveal of Colin doing the mask for Lecter and standing stock still…and once he actually starts speaking, coming through in a very tinny voice.

Ryan, upon the quirk reveal, does all the acting with his eyes. It is masterful.

Brad: “ALL I KNOW IS IF CARLA KICKS ME AGAIN, I’M GONNA WRING HER NECK…”

Patrick, showing his hand a biiiit too much: “I think Brad’s a drag queen”
Drew: “You wanna guess one more time…about TV Brad instead of real Brad.”
Brad chuckles at this

Patrick tries guessing Ryan, chuckling
Drew: “Ryan Stiles is HIMSELF.”

Not a bad LMAD, but pretty basic.

Drew, to Ryan: “Somebody’s gonna get  the rolling pin when he gets home…”
Ryan: [raises an eyebrow]

Film, TV & Theater Styles: Ryan and Colin are two alligator hunters in  the Everglades

Ryan: [uses duck call]
Colin: [shakes head]
Colin, pulling out  a different call: “…ALLIGATOR. ALLIGATOR.”
HA

Elvis movie:
Colin: “Look, we’ve got to get all the alligators so we can make a pair of pants that can fit ya…”
Ryan, as this registers, chuckles in his Elvis impression. THAT got him.

They have to do  South Park, where Colin has baseline knowledge, and Ryan has none. So he’s sort of staying back, no help at all.
Colin: “…you’ve never  seen  South Park, have you?”
Ryan: [vomits]

The Star Trek scene is pretty silly. Colin does some solid work as Spock, and Ryan goes “go ahead…Spock” into his tricorder
Colin, confusedly: ‘I’M RIGHT HERE!”
Once Drew buzzes, they both break a bit

Ryan ends the kung-fu scene keeling  over
Drew: “lone ranger”
Ryan, lifting up his head: “Alligator come.”
Everyone who’s watched Whose Line: [knows what’s coming]
Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-24 at 5.43.01 PM
[“don’t you dare”]
Brad and Drew are losing it.
Drew: [buzzes before anyone can do anything else]

A goofy enough F&TS, but not too great

Weird Newscasters: Brad anchors, RYAN, a bad magician, CO-ANCHORS, Patrick, an emotional actor accepting an award, does sports while COLIN, desperate to go to the bathroom, does WEATHER

This is a very weird configuration.

The pickups for this game, Brad does a vulgar name, and Ryan, in character, goes “AND I WILL MAKE A BRITISH ASSHOLE APPEAR…” right before Dan shows up to interrupt the scene.

Ryan starts by pulling his wedding ring out of Brad’s ear. Contrary to popular belief, it DOES slip off easily…

Ryan: ‘what is that, Brad’ [mimes a bird coming  out of his shirt]
Brad: “…that’s your hands going like this…”
Ryan: [sinks]

Patrick’s is pretty fantastic, doing his sports routine WHILE accepting the award, tearing  up as he  details the junior olympics, and how someone was ‘beaten by a fetus who does the uneven bars’.
Bold statement- Patrick Bristow is the closest we got to having Steve Carell on Whose Line. Because this seems like something  he’d do.

Colin: “If you’re in the area where the heavy  showers are happening….urine trouble…”
HA
And he just starts hopping  around nervously

A very  fun WN. This configuration actually worked well, and there were a number of really  nice gags.

Secret: Colin and Ryan are Adam and Eve, the secret’s under the fig leaf

Last playing of this with Drew, but thankfully it’s all over the CW version

They’re both on uneven  territory from the start, but once Ryan pulls something out from behind the fig leaf and asks Colin “what is this?”, Colin buckles. He has nothing. And neither does Ryan.

Colin, finally: “…it’s one of my extra ribs, I was gonna make a mistress.”

You can tell they’re still on edge when as Ryan brings on  the serpent, and just uses his arm, Colin buckles again. He’s really struggling

Not a great secret. Neither of them really had any idea what to do with this, so they shrugged through the whole thing.

Newsflash: Brad, Patrick and Ryan in the studio, Colin in the field in front of underwater sports

Last of these with 3 people til late in CW version.

Patrick: “Are you breathing right now? You seem to be breathing.”
Colin: “…yes, I find that helps when I want to stay alive.”
pff

Colin: “and we’re not sure, but we THINK a congressman is involved…”

Colin: “I’m underwater…with FISH?”
Drew: “no..”
Colin: “…CAN I HAVE A CLUE?”
Ryan, just done: “YOU’RE IN A POOL.”

Another very basic Newsflash.

Scene to Rap: mini-market

We are led to believe this is a setup for a Hoedown…only to segue right into Scene to Rap, with  some VERY POORLY-EDITED transition clips.

Drew: “Let’s go, like…uh…like a 7-11. I, uh, I dunno if we can say 7-11 on the air.”
SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. 7-11 GETS CENSORED. WHY. THE FUCK. DOES A BRAND NAME GET CENSORED NOW…WHEN ‘CHEETOS’ OR HOWEVER MANY THEY COULD/COULDN’T USE GET OUT OKAY???

Brad  and Patrick start verses at the  same time. Brad just exits, thinking they’re gonna start again

Patrick has a very clumsy verse to his.

Brad, dodging the lawsuits: “Thanks for shopping at the…6-10.”

Ryan  comes in with a very bad Indian accent that hasn’t aged well

A VERY CLUMSY Scene to Rap. Dear god this was rough.

Overall: Not great, and certainly not as good as 8×03. Only Weird Newscasters felt like it was worthy of airing, the rest were either too okay, too dull, or complete messes.

Show Winners: All 4
Best Performer: Colin was the consistent standout performer.
Worst Performer: Patrick, by default.
Best Game: Weird Newscasters, proving even a flip-script configuration works here.
Worst Game: Scene to Rap was dead on arrival, and it just kept going and getting progressively worse.
Should it Have Aired in S1?: No.

COMING UP NEXT: A Greg episode from the same taping as the underdone 1×11.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E14, or Don’t Get Me Started On the Cutlery

When I covered 1×14, I was amused by how it sort of worked, but also how it could have worked more. Brad was the sole musical performer, but he proved he needed Wayne a lot during Song Styles. Ian was a good fourth seater, but he could  have been edited better. And now we finally get a second show from it, so hopefully it’ll make up for everything I could have used in the S1  show

Daytime Talk Show: Jack and Jill: Brad hosts, Ryan and Colin are guests, Ian’s in the audience

Ryan: “I’m Dr. Phillip Glassman, I’m Jack’s personal physician. I can tell you that he didn’t actually break his crown, it was a small fracture.

Brad: “Is that how long a crown usually takes to heal?”
Ryan: “Well, if you’re involved in a dangerous sport such as [remembers] fetching water, then yes…”

Colin, as the owner of the hill: “I had to kick THEM away, JACK SPRATT WAS EATING MY  FAT…”

Brad: “is there any truth to the rumor that the dish and the spoon were also seen on that hill?”
Colin: “OHHHHH DON’T GET ME STARTED ON THE CUTLERY.”
HA

Ryan: “The hill is not in any shape for people to ru-”
Colin: “IT’S A HILL.”
Ryan: “He has a huge wall that a big egg fell off of…”
I love how many nursery rhymes they’re throwing in. This is a really fun one

Brad, pointing to Ian: “You, sir, dressed like a pumpkin…”
Ian: “Yeah, I’m Jill’s, uh, stepbrother…”
Colin, using the wardrobe as a way in: “I RECOGNIZE YOU PETER PETER..”
HA

Ian does a good job, but he doesn’t seem to do much with the gifts the others give him.
Brad: “Mr. Pumpkineater, you shouldn’t cast stones, you can’t even keep your wife…”
I love Ian sitting down, saddened, as the audience ‘OHHHHs’

Brad is about to sign off
Ryan, knowing how this works: “Excuse me…can we fight now?”
HA

A really good DTS. Lots of fun comedy details.

Film, TV & Theater Styles: Colin and Ryan have been working too long at the fish-cutting factory and Colin is beginning to crack

WHAT IS WITH ALL THIS FISH-CUTTING????

Ryan: “Jerry, you might not wanna have that second cup”
Drew, buzzing: “Martha Stewart”
Ryan: “But if you do, why not use one of these mugs I just made?”

The Elvis style is good because it establishes stakes [“we’ve got to gut all these fish before the big concert tonight”], has Ryan’s reliable Elvis impression, and Colin has the line of “You’ve just cut your guitar-strumming hand!”

The Shining gets Ryan into a Jack Nicholson impression, chasing Colin around

The ‘family movie’ style is great, and has them do a wholesome, dramatic monologue about ‘Jimmy the fish’. Really good stuff from both of them

A pretty good F&TS. Kinda close to UK playings.

Song Styles: Brad sings a country western ballad to Lynelle, a marketing assistant for a home video movie company

Brad has a very fun  voice for this character, making it a very silly serious country song, and then:
“Today was gonna be  the happiest morn
Lynelle goes off to sell POOORNNN…”
BAM.

Brad: “She sells videos…of guys and girls
And crazy trained monkeys dressed up like little squirrels”
I love Brad

Brad: “Lynelle, you make my heart swell
Sometimes I think I’ve died  and went to…….
HEAVEN.”
NICE SAVE

A really, REALLY good song from Brad, and one piece of evidence that he could hold his own in singing games without Wayne, even if other games this season proved otherwise.

Newsflash: IAN AND COLIN AND BRAD in the studio, Ryan in the field in front of Women frantically shopping for clothes at a department store

All three stop by  interrupting each other with newsflashes.
Brad: “I’m the only one with my finger in my ear, so I should be the one to interrupt…”
Ian: [plugs both his ears]

Brad: “Are you in any danger yourself?”
Ryan: “No, as you can tell I’m wearing long underwear…”

Ryan: “The US won a gold for this particular event right here..”

I love the struggle between Brad and Ryan where Brad is trying to get him to go into detail about what’s behind him and Ryan still doesn’t know.
Brad: “could you actually use some descriptive nouns?”
Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 3.49.00 PM

An okay Newsflash, but it was fun to see Ryan struggling

Props: Ian and Ryan vs. Brad and Colin

Colin and Brad rarely get to pair up in this game, so this’ll be fun.

Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 3.52.21 PMColin: “For god’s sake, Jessup, you’ve gotta stop experimenting on the sperm…”

Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 3.53.37 PM
Ryan: “I’m afraid your cow is dead”
I LOVE HOW IAN’S HEAD SINKS AFTER THISScreen Shot 2020-05-23 at 3.54.21 PMIan: “I’m afraid your octopus is dead.”
YES!

There’s a famous unaired one from this game, where Ryan holds the prop upright and goes ‘whatever it is, it’s got six dicks.’ Obviously this doesn’t go, so Ryan tries again, bending one of the tendrils back: “whatever it is, it’s got FIVE dicks…”

Pretty good Props

Sportscasters: Brad and Ian comment on Ryan and Colin as two flight attendants

Ryan has a good move in  farting in the oxygen mask and shoving it in Colin’s face.

Colin has a rebuttal by using a barf bag and clapping it in Ryan’s face. These are getting the right type of intricate.
Brad: “and it looks like he had some fettuccini…”
BRAD.

I also love Brad’s move of saying all of these maneuvers are Czechoslovakian in origin.

Brad: “Well, he’s putting  his  head into the upright tray table”
Ryan clearly  is smacking Colin’s crotch area with it
Brad: “…well, I THOUGHT it was his head…BUT SOMETHING’S in the upright position!”
NICE SAVE

This even has an epic ending, with  Ryan  opening the plane door and sucking Colin out, with his butt pushing Colin too.
Brad: “This is just like the ending of Air Force One…ONLY BETTER.”

Ryan has a parachute ready, and Colin has, to quote Brad, “his gossamer flight attendant wings”. Colin  ends up cutting Ryan’s parachute, which is a very epic and cinematic move

It started slow, but this  turned into a really epic and satisfying Sportscasters. Really impressive progression!

90-Second Alphabet:  In an Old West saloon, Ryan accuses Drew of cheating in a card game, and Colin is Miss Kitty, trying to calm things down

The last aired playing of this one.

Colin completely forgets the letter Q- “RALPH, JERRY, NO.”
Drew: “QUIET.”
Colin, after a second: “……oh yeah.”
HA

As they duel
Ryan: “xylophone music…I hear xylophone music…”
Colin just starts playing the xylophone in the background

This has a very clumsy  ending once they try to end it in 20 seconds.

Not a great one of these, but they at least had fun with it.

Overall: Kind of all over the place, but generally a good enough show. Daytime Talk Show, F&TS, Song Styles and Sportscasters were all really fun, creative playings, and make up for Ian not doing a lot and the other games being really pedestrian.

Show Winners: Ryan  and Colin
Best Performer: Ryan had the stronger, scene lifting moments all through tonight, but Brad comes very close.
Worst Performer: Ian once again didn’t get a lot of his stuff in the edit.
Best Game: Sportscasters felt the most fully-realized for me.
Worst Game: 90-Second Alphabet was very messy.
Should It Have Aired in S1?: It’s better than 1×14, so sure!

Coming Up Next: It’s only fair that the Patrick-Brad taping from 8×03 get one more episode. So here it is.

Whose Watchdown is it Anyway: S08E13, or I Feel Dirty and Used

Denny Siegel is all over this season, and seeing as it’s S1 Denny it’s better than it could have been. Despite not being perfect in some scenes [Fashion Models], she’s been a solid support performer in  both her S8 shows, and it’s been better than her subpar S2 material.

Anyway, this is her latest S8 show, coming from the S1 taping that gave us the strong 1×18

Weird Newscasters: Denny anchors, Colin, Awkward teenager on his first date with the anchor, co-anchors, Wayne, Richard Simmons, does sports while Ryan, Attached to the anchor by a strong rubber band, does weather

When Drew announces Wayne is playing  Richard Simmons, he smiles and nods, like ‘figures’. Ryan wipes his brow in relief.

Ryan has a delayed double-take reaction to his

Denny: “Our top story, residents of-”
Ryan:
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 12.44.52 PM
Yeah, he’s got this down

Colin’s also really good at his:
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 12.46.16 PM

Wayne’s Richard Simmons is, obviously, fantastic. Just all energy

Denny: “This just in, I’m completely off men for the rest of my life.”
This is already a good line, but it’s also followed up with Wayne going “NOT ME”, which is, while obvious, still funny

Ryan’s is just all immense physicality, and he does really well at snapping back and forth between the weather board and in front of the stools

Until we end on this:
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 1.55.55 PM
SO FUNNY

A really good Weird Newscasters. Denny did a good job corralling all these personalities, and I love the ending  with Ryan and Colin converging on her.

Denny, chuckling  back at the seats: “…I feel dirty and used.”
Drew, jokingly callous: “HEY GREAT, 1000 POINTS.”
This sets Denny apart from someone like Kathy Greenwood- she addresses it and makes a joke out of it, like the guys. Her personality is right up there with the other 3.

Song Styles: Wayne sings to housewife Shelley as James Brown

James Brown is another impression Wayne can do in his sleep, and he has the energy and pomp to him, as this is one of the first times he does it on the show.

Wayne has SO MUCH DOWN, like the little asides Brown makes, and the double-speed verses, and the little dancing around. Shelley obviously loves it.

James: “We’d have a house and a kid, and we’ve live like Ozzie and Harriet’
[Another reference to Wayne’s classic TV upbringing]

Wayne: “We’ll have one kid, or maybe 3 or 4
and we’ll be knockin boots, and they won’t knock on our door”
SO ‘ASS’ GETS CENSORED 2 SHOWS AGO BUT THIS LINE’S ALL GOOD??

A really damn good number from Wayne. A lot of good lyrics, a great impression, and some more energy and mastery from Wayne.

Narrate: Bowling alley

The [sigh] last aired playing of this game

Ryan: “His face looked familiar. I didn’t know if it was from my past, or from some dog food can I’d kicked around in an alley today…”
Ryan always savage in this game

Colin has a comeback ready, though: “He was good looking like I had an afro.”

Ryan has a great meta gag  about Colin’s narrates: “y’see, every time he comes forward to talk…he steps over the line”
That’s a sly bowling gag. Very clever

Colin, narrating: “I was gonna enjoy showing this guy up, I DON’T CARE ABOUT ANY LINE…”
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“…I CAN GO ANYWHERE I WANT…”Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.08.17 PM
YES
Colin: “BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA, THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD. AND IF A MAN CAN’T WALK OVER THE BOWLING LINE…THEN  WE MIGHT AS WELL WALK AROUND  WITH TIN CANS ON OUR EARS…AND SOME SOUR CREAM ON OUR HEAD.”
Lines like these make it easy to justify why I always give Colin show wins

Colin  bowls without looking and dances around, confidently. However, Ryan’s the one leading  the scene, and he decides “…tough break.” Colin has to adjust his demeanor.
Ryan, upstage: “looks like the  concrete I put under the pins worked”

Drew buzzes a bit early, and even Ryan’s confused as to why he does that THEN.

A good Narrate, though  the first half was a little slower than  the second.

Props: Ryan and Denny vs. Colin and Wayne

First of two episodes featuring an orange prop with several penis-like appendages

Ryan’s fish impression as Denny  works the hook really gets the audience here

Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.15.33 PMWayne: “Elmo is a graduate of Three Mile Island elementary school…”
Very clever joke from Wayne

Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.16.58 PMDenny: “Look, Señor, the Mark of SORRO.”
HA

Denny dragging Ryan off with the hook is even funnier by her yell of ‘YOU STINK’ as she does it

Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.18.37 PMColin: “WAS IT YER FIRST TIME MAKIN’ A PEG LEG?”

A pretty good props. Some good creative moments here.

Greatest Hits: Songs of the Fish Cutter

I love Wayne hearing the suggestion…looking out, confusedly, and mouthing ‘…what the hell is a fish-cutter?’

Drew: “Honest to god, this is what Ryan used to do for a living. So this’ll be easy for RYAN to do…”
Wayne:
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I love this

Colin titles the swing number ‘Of Cod and Country’
Wayne, who rarely is ever this screwed in this game, cracks up

Wayne’s first verse is a little bland, but once he gets to double-time lyrics in the next verse he  gets REALLY into a  groove, and his confidence comes back.

Ryan has another title that gets Wayne: “someone  call the carps!”
Wayne…just isn’t gonna get out of this game easily, is he?

Wayne’s Jamaica number is also pretty damn good, and he  gets the speed of the lyrics down while also being pretty damn funny.

Colin: “That brings back memories for me, that was the first song I was beaten up to…”

Colin is stumped for a rock-and-roll title, so he just goes with  “your place or mine”?
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.40.10 PMScreen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.39.50 PM
DEAR GOD

Wayne’s Elvis number is the weakest of the three, but it’s still a pretty good one, and he ends it well.

A really strong Greatest Hits. Somehow they got out of there without breaking Wayne, and all the songs and setups were really good.

Dead Bodies: Drew is a Baywatch lifeguard who has just saved Jaris from drowning, Denny is Drew’s jealous girlfriend

This one was previewed on the bloopers of the DVD

Colin’s ultimate goal is to get Drew, or whoever, to break. So he starts off by having Drew dancing:
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.43.42 PM
AND DREW BREAKS IMMEDIATELYScreen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.43.54 PM
The whole point of the game is for Drew to stay still, and literally the first opportunity he gets, he breaks. That just sums up NOT ONLY DREW, but COLIN, in this game.

Once Colin finishes, He takes a moment. Drew is still recovering.
Colin, as Jaris: “ONE MORE TIIIIIME.”
Yep. More pain for Drew.
Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.46.31 PM

Then Colin decides he’s gonna move his arms up and do this sort of ‘WHAAAAWA, WHAAAAWA’ sort of song, and Drew can’t take this either:Screen Shot 2020-05-23 at 2.46.41 PM
Like this is some classical music standard I’m supposed to know, maybe Colin moved Kinley around as a kid to this song, but it gets Drew laughing SO DAMN HARD

Colin, as Drew: “Oh  no, she’s still unconscious…I BETTER GIVE HER MOUTH TO MOUTH.
Drew: [smiles]

Colin has Jaris kiss Drew, and he adds this ‘BLUBLUBLUBLBULB’ sound effect that is the latest thing to crack up Drew

Colin has a whole catfight between Denny and Jaris
Colin, as Drew: “GIRLS, GIRLS, DON’T FIGHT OVER ME, THERE’S ENOUGH FOR EVERYONE”
Colin has used that line in this game before, but it gets Drew and Ryan

A very, VERY goofy playing of this game.

Overall: Nothing in this episode came below ‘really good’ for me, so this was another really solid S8 show. I know I was prepped for chaos this season, and while there has been some, this is another really good one that  belonged in Season 1. Weird Newscasters, Song Styles, Narrate, Props and Greatest Hits would have been right at home in Season 1, and Denny did some more strong work throughout.

Show Winner: Colin and Denny
Best Performer: This was nearly a three-way tie. Wayne, however, dominated the most games he was in, so I had to give it to him.
Worst Performer: Denny, who was good tonight but not edited well.
Best Game: Greatest Hits. Says a lot about Wayne when even THAT TOPIC ends up being a great one for him.
Worst Game: Dead Bodies was silly more than all else, even if it was still alright.
Should it Have Aired in S1?: YES.

COMING UP NEXT: We lose Wayne but gain Ian Gomez for an episode from 1×14’s taping.