I find it very fitting that this week, the week of a performer associated as a panel show double-act partner of Noel Fielding was thrown under the bus thanks to abuse allegations, is also the week that an episode of Buzzcocks airs which revives a much more wholesome duo pairing featuring Noel Fielding.
At long last, Paloma Faith, one of my all-time favorite Buzzcocks guests, returns to the show in the seat next to Noel. Every show that Paloma guested on during the 2010s was incredible, with this sort of infectious, lovable wackiness that could not be ignored. It was especially wonderful to see her paired with Noel a lot, especially in the one with Paloma, Noel and Tony Law on one team. I’m genuinely happy she’s back, and I’m very excited for this show.
This episode also gave Daisy May Cooper a pretty wild panel as well, with comedian and panel show staple Judi Love on one side and genuine metal singer Benji Webbe, lead of reggae-metal outfit Skindred. Inspired bookings all around, and they’re only gonna get more inspired as we go forward [especially next week. Man oh man that’ll be fun.]
Greg, introing Benji: “for three years now I’ve said to producers, ‘isn’t it time we had some Welsh cult metal-reggae on the show?’ AND FINALLY SOMEONE’S LISTENED. Was it REALLY THAT HARD?”
I realize now that Benji would be Mark Lamarr’s worst nightmare. On the one hand, reggae. On the other hand, METAL.
This, for the record, is how Paloma showed up tonight:
I would expect nothing less
Paloma, removing her hat: ‘this was made from the pubic hair of seventeen leprechauns.”
INCREDIBLE
It’s funny, Paloma talks about banning ugg boots from her wardrobe because it’s not a wise use of fur. We know from this show that the only time she’s okay with Uggs is when an actual rabbit is wearing them
I love Noel admitting, while cracking up, “when I first started dating my partner, she had ugg boots, and when she took a shower I threw ’em out the window.”
Judi talks about meeting the King at a Commonwealth event, but I like the details about her stockpiling snacks and munching on Doritos when it happened
Daisy talks about working at a store and not knowing she was checking out Princess Anne
Greg: “Princess Anne does not pop into a shop to buy towels.”
Daisy: “well she was bloody browsing them”
Jamali mentions he met Prince Harry once. “I was working in a historical shop and he came in wanting, like, a party outfit.”
HAAAA. The whole panel goes down at this
Jamali: “he wanted to a buy a pope’s outfit, I went “nah, you want THIS.”
Noel: “let me show you my Hello, Hello collection…”
I do like Benji going into detail about ‘the wall of death’ in mosh pits, even insisting “LIP COME OFF.”
Benji is very loose on the panel, and I absolutely love the moment, after Judi asks if he ever jumps in, he goes, very casually, “no, love, what I have ta do…”
I do like the demonstration of the ‘Newport helicopter’, which prevents against moshing because people are throwing their hands in the air. “NOT ONE LIP COME OFF.”
On why Axl Rose showed up 3 hours late to a gig in Florida:
It is most likely B [Greg sings the last bit as Axl would and plays in the riff from Welcome to the Jungle], but I really hope it’s C.
Greg: “You saw who Axl Rose was compared to the last time he played Glastonbury? I’ll give you a clue. [PLAYS IN EASTENDERS DRUM THEME]”
…this somehow always works for me on this show
Daisy: “well, one of the Turtles was really fit, wasn’t he?”
Judi: “yeah, I think it was the purple-headed one.”
AND THEY UNITE ON THIS. Somehow the metal singer is the more composed one here.
Greg, perfectly: “okay, so YOU wanted to fuck a turtle..”
Jamali makes a joke about not thinking badgers are real because he’s never seen a live one. Greg jumps off of that, saying they must chuck dead ones out at all points.
Benji, as if this isn’t a natural extension of the conversation: “I’VE SEEN A BADGER.”
Benji: “AND THIS THING’S GOING…[INFERNAL SCREECHING]”
Greg: “that’s not a badger.”
Noel: “that’s a DRAGON…”
Benji: “It wasn’t a dragon, I’D SEEN A DRAGON TOO. But that was when I had mushrooms.”
PFFFF. And he’s got comedic timing. I thought he was gonna make a Wales joke.
I love Paloma asking Jamali if Secret of the Ooze is in his Top 5. “Like, Casablanca, bollocks, FUCKIN THIS FILM?” Paloma knows where the funny is and knows how to get it out of people
Greg, as Daisy locks in C, confirms that they think “Axl kept people waiting for three hours to finish watching Teenage Mut-“
Paloma: “hang on, THREE HOURS? That film’s not three hours long, it can’t be.”
Jamali: “yeah, but it’s an hour and a half and you’ve gotta watch it twice to really get the subtext.”
Noel and Paloma I knew would do well off each other. Paloma and JAMALI? They’re surprising me.
As it turns out, Daisy was somehow right, and it ends up being C.
On why Lemmy Kilmister couldn’t partake in a charity cricket match:
The contrast between the first two and C is fantastic.
Paloma admits to getting 36 verrucas from the baths
Noel: “was it from that shallow bit before you get into the pool?”
Greg: “36?? That’s more verruca than foot!”
Benji confirms it’s not a fun time, and Noel asks how he dealt with em.
Benji, very Welshly: “Cigarettes, my mum used to put fags on our feet.”
Greg, perfectly: “…that’s not the medical way.”
Greg, I think knowing what’s gonna happen, asks if Jamali ever played cricket at school
Jamali: “do you think OUR SCHOOL had the equipment for cricket? …well, cricket’s just baseball for pussies, isn’t it?”
I like Greg’s account of Lemmy taking too much of a medicine he mistook for speed, then hallucinating for 2 weeks. “He told the NME that he was sitting, reading a book, “I’d turn to page 42 and there was no book.”‘ I really wish we had Phill Jupitus onhand to corroborate some of this madness.
Paloma motions to the monitor and goes ‘it’s one of them..”
Jamali: “…’it’s one of them’ and you point at ALL OF THEM?”
Jamali’s been having a strong night so far, and somehow saying a lot more than Noel
The funniest goddamned thing- Noel and Jamali feel content going with C, but Paloma’s convinced it’s A. Noel decides to lock in C, and Greg has the wryest smile on his face when he tells them that Paloma was right. Noel almost emits this sort of dying whale yelp when he hears this.
Paloma: “PATRIARCHY WINS AGAIN!”
And she has this little laugh. I did really miss her.
I love Greg’s line after the break, “the show where four regular experts on music are NOT ON THE SHOW..”
He cracks up rounding the next line, too.
Paloma and Jamali’s first intro is well done…by Paloma. Jamali occasionally comes in and adds a drumbeart.
Greg: “would it help to isolate Jamali’s “…chht.”?”
I love Greg passing it over to Daisy’s team
Daisy: “is it Everybody by the Backstreet Boys”
and her and Benji just SHRUG.
Greg: “…thanks for havin’ a GUESS.”
A lot of dynamic moments are lifting this show so far
Sometimes the prompter jokes can just be simple, and that’s enough for me.
Greg: “that was La Roux with Bulletproof. Spoiler alert: she’s not.”
Paloma begins the next intro by standing up on the table.
Greg: “the director just said that she’s not sure if this is safe.”
Paloma even says that she takes full responsibility if she falls and plummets
Greg: ‘if that happens, I shall catch you IN THIS HAT.”
I’m so glad that the show’s playing along with Paloma’s energy rather than against it
Jamali, perfectly: “I like how everyone thinks Greg is quick enough.”
Paloma and Jamali’s 2nd one is good, I think. My guess is Promised You a Miracle by Simple Minds, but I could be wrong. Noel isn’t sure.
Paloma: “COME ONNNNNN”
Noel: “I knew you’d get annoyed.”
I love that. Even 10 years later it all comes flooding back.
It ends up being a Take That song, which…yeah, picture Noel listening to Take That.
Benji and Judi’s first intro is not one I seem to recognize, but it gets everybody moving, including Greg. Kinda love how well these two work off each other.
HELL, EVEN PALOMA COMES OVER TO HELP:
AND THEN:
This is so fun!
I love how Greg has to cut off the fun using the Eastenders drums again
WAIT SOMEHOW IT WAS CANDY BY CAMEO. I knew I recognized it vaguely. That’s awesome, that’s a great song!
Here’s what separates Daisy and Paloma for me, as Candy plays in:
Daisy: “I’ve never heard it!”
Paloma: “I’ve never been to a party where it’s not on!”
Paloma’s going to the correct parties, then
Benji is actually really damned good at intros, I’m just not placing what either of his and Judi’s are. Thankfully, neither is Daisy
I do like Greg adding in “Jesus Christ, it’s SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL.”
It turns out to be a much better rendition of Señorita by Shawn Mendes and Camilla Cabello. That is why you get metal singers on here.
This completely bewilders the whole room, because Benji somehow made that into a really good, almost 70s-sounding song
Noel: “That is what I can only describe as Page 42 in Lemmy’s Book.”
Greg recounts a line from Senorita, ‘friends don’t know the way you taste’: “Not true, I’ve never tasted Jamali, but I’m pretty sure he tastes of pussy and vape.”
Jamali laughs HARD at that.
Daisy’s team has to pick out the girl from the Craig David 7 Days video:
Daisy: “#1 has definitely got a cupcake business.”
#1 even sort of agrees with this
Judi, who’s mostly played defense this show, has a great bit where she prompts the five of them to do sexy poses from the video, and it’s very silly
Daisy: “3’s having NONE of this.”
Judi: “Come on, #3, DIG DEEP, LIKE IT’S DICK.”
PFFF
Very interesting that Daisy’s gut instinct of #5 ends up being right even if both Benji and Judi have a feeling it’s 3, as did I.
I also love the bit where Judi insists Muna spill on kissing Craig David [“did ‘e have soft lips”] while Greg tries to preserve decency, going “we don’t ask them that, we ask them what they’re doing THESE days.” Maybe it’s because she did Taskmaster, but Judi has a very fun dynamic with Greg
Noel’s team has to figure out who the graffiti artist from Beats International was. Even describing that [“the graffiti artist who painted designs on the stage while the band performed”] cracks up Greg
Paloma: “#4’s very thoughtful.”
Jamali: “#4 looks like he tried to make a real boy out of wood.”
He’s just so good at this.
The whole panel laughs at that visual for a good 10 seconds
Jamali: “every selfie #3 takes is like a missing persons advert.”
PFFF
#3: [hides a smirk]
Noel: “…fucking hell…”
Paloma: “I think #5 is the most helpful.”
Noel: “why, because his beard tells you which way to go?”
That whole panel has been in the giggle zone since this round started, and I kinda love it
Judi: “you haven’t mentioned #2”
Jamali: “NO ONE’s ever mentioned #2.”
JESUS.
Noel: “is #4 falling asleep?”
Paloma: “he’s having an existential crisis.”
Greg: “well, he’s worried sick about the puppet, he’s on his own!”
They’re all having so much fun with him, and I don’t blame him
It somehow ends up being #2, and he clearly wants nothing to do with Jamali after that comment.
There’s an extra game round that’s intriguing, where Greg plays in a little-known song and the teams have to pick out the famous song that sampled it. I like finding stuff like that.
Also, it’s a game I’m very good at, because within 2 seconds of hearing the first one I can tell you it’s Harder Better Faster Stronger by Daft Punk.
Daisy gets it pretty easily, too.
For the second one, I just had this gut feeling that it was gonna be Hips Don’t Lie, even for the 7 seconds before that bit came in.
It’s amusing seeing Greg trying to pronounce the clearly-foreign title of the film that the hook of Toxic by Britney Spears was featured in. He seems to get a kick out of it as well.
And then, a second into the fourth one I can tell it’s My Name Is by Eminem. What’s great is that these are all songs from Daisy’s upbringing, almost as if the game’s more suited to her these days even if she’s shit at Intros.
[to be fair, Paloma does get the Eminem one]
Hell, even Noel mutters “we’ve got no chance” after that round.
Noel, at the start of Next Lines: “we can’t win, so why not just mess about? Greg HATES it when we mess about.”
What’s amusing about this one is that Paloma’s so into making joke-answers that she misses her own next line, and cracks up at it. Haven’t seen THAT ONE before..
I love the move that Noel has, where as Greg announces that Daisy’s team won, he slowly puts Paloma’s hat on Greg.
Overall: A fun show that got over a slow start. These were three excellent panel choices that elevated the fact that there’s not a ton of emphasis on the ‘game’ of NMTB anymore. Intros was great because both Paloma and Benji brought it. ID Parade had a ton of fun moments. I loved Paloma’s dynamic with both Noel and Jamali, and their panel was fun to watch all night. I also liked Judi and Benji working off each other, as well as how into it Benji was despite being an inspired choice for Buzzcocks. There’s still issues with this incarnation of the show that stops me from loving it, but there was a lot this show did correctly, and it’s true to form for earlier Paloma Faith episodes.
Best Regular: Jamali arguably had more moments working off Paloma than Noel
Best Guest: Paloma Faith, who was as lovely as ever
Coming Up Next: If you thought THESE THREE were some inspired bookings, get a load of what’s coming next week. An OMG booking in the spirit of Nile Rodgers, and another fun return in the spirit of Paloma.
In which Jordan writes about stuff 